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What makes a man emotionally attached to a woman?

Tagged as: Age differences, Big Questions, Dating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 January 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 18 January 2011)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

For the first time ever, I swallowed! Will this make a man appreciate you more? Not that I did it for that reason, but just wondering since I heard that if a female squirts she can become so attached to him. I did this because 1) I like givin my bf bj's and 2)because he had fantasized about that :) ...

Anyway, what gets a man emotionally attached to you? I'm asking because i don't want to get him attached to me. He's twice my age and I don't really see myself marrying him. He says he loves me and right now, I know I don't. I really like him and love spending time with him and experiencing something so new (he's my first also), but I just cant imagine ever telling my parents about him (although my friends know and like him too).. well anyway thats not the topic... what does get a man into a woman?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (18 January 2011):

Honeypie agony auntDepends on the couple.

I highly doubt that a women will become more attached to a guy if she "squirts" with him. Maybe it's more the fact that he doesn't have a problem with it, or he didn't think she just peed herself.

Sex can bring a couple closer together, but sometimes sex is JUST sex.

And giving your BF a blow job is not going to make me more emotionally attached then having a great memory together of just about anything.

If you don't know if you realllllly love him, that's ok. It's still new, just don't string him along because you can.

SHARING life is a way of bonding.

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (18 January 2011):

dirtball agony auntLots of things contribute, not just the sex. Everything from how we interact, to looks, to just a feeling you get that's impossible to quantify. If you don't want him to get attached, then perhaps it's time to break up. The longer you're together, the more attached he will become.

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A female reader, Spades Canada +, writes (18 January 2011):

Spades agony auntWhat attaches a man to a women is the same thing that attaches a women to a man. We're not all that different. And we can't always put into words why we have feelings for one another. What it is exactly that we like about them. It could be how he feels around you, your personality, circumstances, whatever it is. I can be different for everybody.

There's no solid answer to that question.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2011):

Yes, emotional attachment holds a man more closely to a woman. But there are many variables that can result in an emotional attachment.

An emotional relationship is often forged when two people meet one or many needs (on both sides) are met by the other party. It's a meshing of needs, obligations, desires, wants, motivations on both sides, met in such a way that it's like a finely put together jigsaw.

Where no one else has the exact same set of attributes (jigsaw pieces). And the whole puzzle would be incomplete if any of the pieces were withdrawn. So the bonds between the two persons are solid and deep.

Strong emotional attachments I have seen include:

*A man who used to stutter. A not all that good looking but also very kind woman helped him get over the stutter. He never forgot her kindness. He wooed her, married her. And amazingly she blossomed. He encouraged her to buy nice clothes. They did lots of physical things together. But then they faced the pain that she could not have children. It drew them closer together. Now 20 years later they are a more attractive couple than when they first married. And so in sync that no one could doubt they are a couple

*a man who idealised his wife. To him she never aged from the day they married. He'd made a vow long before he reached his teens to cherish whoever he chose as his own wife above all others. He married young and his wife loved being so cherished, as well as how much of an avalanche of money he showered on her. Her childhood had started well, until her father left the state with a young woman, leaving his wife and his children in poor financial position. So the daughter of this family was determined to marry a man who have the money and the social status she lost when her/own father deserted her family. As far as the man she married : His own mother died at birth. And his own father had a string of women before and after the birth of

his son who went on to cherish his own wife. If the money had ever been less - then he may have lost this wife.

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