A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I followed this guy on Instagram and he instantly followed me back. Our first chat was about the snow in uk then he invited me to gym with him but I said let’s take a rain check and rearrange We’ve had flirty banter I asked him his birthday he asked mine. But didn’t ask my age. Out last convo was about a holiday and I said that I’d ask him for recommendations when I go to a place his visited which he replied deff!! A little convo ended in talking about marriage but when I asked his ideal husband I didn’t get a reply He puts a lot of winky faces in messages too Online he seems attractive and I’d like to get to know him more I have always made the first move so I’m not sure if this guy is being nice or if it is a mutual attraction... it’s online so I don’t want to read into things but I do fancy him How do I move this forward and find out more
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2018): [EDIT]:
"I'm gay, so let me give you my take on this."
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2018): Instagram is where you showcase your looks and showoff. You get attention and gain followers, not seek boyfriends.
I'm gay, so let me you give you my take on this. He invited you to the gym. You suggested a rain-check! Nope! Wrong move! Suggests to him you might be hiding something.
Someone who loves attention does not like to be postponed or rejected. He's a star in his own mind; so you missed that bus, boyfriend!
He doesn't want to lose a follower; because numbers are a tribute to his vanity. So he'll keep-up the flirtations and banter; but when his numbers begin to climb...see-ya later!
Suggest taking him up on his offer to meet at the gym. That is, if you actually do workout. There was a reason for him suggesting that. He wants to make sure you're in-shape. He feels he's a stud-muffin; and therefore, deserves to spend his time with a certified-hottie.
He knew if you had issues about your appearance or lacked confidence; you'd take a pass on giving him a chance to check-out your physique. You didn't give him the chance to showoff his. That's an ego-bruiser! That also cancelled any possibility of an immediate hookup he might have been hoping for. Nobody gets to turn him down, and think they can just comeback as if nothing happened! So it's short polite-responses and lots of emojis! Sharing no personal-info.
What's up with talking about marriage? Seriously?!! Those winky-faces mean slow your roll cowboy, don't go there, are you nuts??? Or, wouldn't YOU like to know?!! In a nutshell, "no further questions, please!"
I'd proceed with caution. I think you'll get strung along. Sweetie, that isn't good for your self-esteem and beneath your dignity. I suggest you part on friendly-terms and move on.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (6 March 2018):
 Generally? I think Instagram is not a good place to be "trolling" for a BF - because all you see there is "fake advertising". It's all about look at me - look at me!
Not so much about "get to know me".
And maybe... going from talking vacation to marriage is a bit presumptuous lol.
I agree with N91 - ask him out for a drink - but I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't answer that either. My guess is he gets plenty of those too.
Putting "winky faces" in messages doesn't mean he is into you. It just means he likes to sound "animated" in conversations or that he isn't a very serious person. Again it's the internet.
He invited you to the gym- why did you decline if you want to get to know him?
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A
male
reader, N91 + ♥, writes (6 March 2018):
 Ask him out for a drink?
There's not much else you can do. If he accepts then it's likely he's interested. If not, then you can move onto someone else.
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