Should I worry about his past? I'm worried his ex was better in bed and also that he may cheat!
Q. I am in a rship with a perfect man (sweet, honest, goodlooking, great in bed, etc ec). We've been together for almost 4 years now... we are both young, in our second year of university, but we started dating in high school when we were 16. Over t...
A. 4 October 2007: Number one, most girls in the age category of 14, or 15 yrs. old (his first g/f's age) are hardly "experiened" in bedroom. Trust me, she was fumbling her way, just like you were in the beginning. Number two, he dumped her for you. So obviously he ... (read in full...)
I'm a verbal bully and need help!
Q. I have a vile and viscious temper (trait passed on from my father) I can generally hold back when dealing with normal situations, but due to the fact my boyfriend is so laid back and quiet and submissive, I (4 years ago) began to easily get mad and ...
A. 3 October 2007: I think you should consider enrolling in anger management classes. It sounds trife, but it will help you understand where your anger is coming from, and be able to deal with it in a more healthy way. Another good way to deal with frustrations is ... (read in full...)
If she keeps gaining weight, after childbirth she could be twice as worst? Should I look beyond the weight and be with her because she makes me happy?
Q. I have being going out with my girlfriend for three and half years and she has really made me very happy we get on so well. Only thing is when I met her she was 12stone. Since we got together she has given up on staying fit and she eats way too much ...
A. 3 October 2007: If she is already having difficulty keeping her weight at a healthy level, it could be genetic. Are her parents heavy and other siblings too? Maybe if you focus on the health aspect, you'll inspire her to eat better. Lead by example. Don't offer ... (read in full...)
I feel this older woman is trying to compete with me regarding clothes, hairstyles... and it's irritating!
Q. I stated working in my dad's company beginning of this year and all was good until this woman who is 6 years older than me started trying to compete with me. I thought i was the only one who noticed but the other ladies at work told me as well. ...
A. 3 October 2007: First of all being 26 is hardly "old" regardless of the fact that she has a baby. As most of us age, we rarely ever feel as old as we are. She probably still sees herself as 22 and she probably enjoys the freshness you bring to the work place, and ... (read in full...)
I have never felt this needy before!!!
Q. About 15 months ago I met a women on eHarmony and in short fell in love and moved from California to Colorado Springs, in the process I was very happy I had left where I came from to start my new wonderful life. I know we jumped into the relation...
A. 3 October 2007: Sometimes there is back-lash when people make too many changes too quickly. You met someone, and then you re-located, which I'm assuming meant, getting a new job too. That's alot to deal with, plus you're still discovering this person, and finding ... (read in full...)
I can't have this baby..my bf is an alcoholic and an angry person! Help!
Q. I am 7 weeks pregnant and can't have this baby because of being in a really bad and progressively worse relationship. My boyfriend is an alcoholic and overall an angry person and so is his family. He wants to have this baby but I don't want to ...
A. 3 October 2007: I think the question should be how do you feel about having a baby. Boyfriends come and boyfriends go. You could simply break up with him and move away before he even knows you're pregnant. I know most people would say, it's his right as the ... (read in full...)
My fiance wants to wait two years until we're married! Isn't that too long?
Q. My fiance to get has told me to wait for 2 years from now so that we can get married,Isn't that too long.Advice please....
A. 3 October 2007: It's never too long when you're going to spend the rest of your lives together and you're still in your 20's. Be patient my dear, I'm sure he has his reasons. It could be financial, or due to a schoool or career committment. Lots of couples remain ... (read in full...)
How do I break up a friends with benefits deal? Is that even a good idea?
Q. HELP!! Im currently dating this guy, and so far we've been having fun to the fullest! Yes we argue but we make up that same instant (nothing serious) , we aren't in a relationship, but were sexually intimate. So u can call it a friends with benefits ...
A. 3 October 2007: Well you could just avoid him altogether, you know don't answer your phone, don't answer your door, or any e-mails he sends you normally. If you do that long enough, he'll get the hint. But I think what you really want to do, is have him as your b/f ... (read in full...)
She said she can't continue the affair though but values my friendship, I can't seem to let her go though!
Q. I love her but she's married...After close to a year she's told me that she can't continue and she can't give me what I want but she values my friendship more than anything. I dunno why but I can't seem to let her go. What do I do? Am I wrong for ...
A. 27 September 2007: Yes, it was wrong to start seeing a married woman, but people do it all the time for various reasons. Usually you think they'll leave their spouse for you. Sometimes they do. This one didn't. At any rate, someone usually ends up getting hurt ... (read in full...)
He keeps ogleing other women
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for two years. We love each other but he needs other female attention and it hurts my feelings. I understand that all people look at attractive people but he takes it over the edge. He stares at attractive women to ...
A. 27 September 2007: Well if he gets jealous when you look at other men, but he can't stop looking at other women, then start gawking at other men and then when he gets pissed off, tell him he has "low self esteem" and ask him if that sounds familiar? You know what ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never wants to have sex
Q. hello i have been trying to find someone i can talk to and hopefully get some advice, i am 23years old been in a relationship for 6years i have 2 children aged 4 and 2, and nobady seems to believe you only have to have sex once to get pregnant ...
A. 27 September 2007: It could be a number of things, your b/f perhaps is feeling the stress of being so young and raising two young children. You've been together long enough that perhaps he's a little bored, or afraid there will be another little bundle of joy that ... (read in full...)
The phone rang after we had just finished sex. Was it ridiculous for me to want to answer the phone? Or for my husband to be hurt?
Q. My husband and I had just finished sex. The phone rang, and I answered it. My husband said it ruined the moment, and I should have let the answering machine pick it up and was really hurt. More info: *I didn't have to get up to answer the pho...
A. 27 September 2007: I would've just let the machine pick it up but then again, I don't get that many calls and I have to be in the mood to talk to people anyhow, so my machine picks up most of my calls then I decide when to call and chat with people so I'm not rushed ... (read in full...)
Her ex who cheated on her twice is back on stage and just proposed her! My gf is now very confused, what should I do?
Q. I've been dating a women for a month and things were going great until her ex started pursuing her. A bit of background on me. After marryting at a very young age, I was divorced 2 yrs ago. No children. I have dated many women since then and ...
A. 27 September 2007: Well it seems like the two of you are fairly close, maybe a frank discussion about what you feel is going on, might help her put things in perspective. She really needs to consider her options very carefully because her ex has proven that he really ... (read in full...)
Love produces love? Can one love be enough for both?
Q. Is there any true in the motto that Love always produces love? Can One's love(honest and indisputable one) produce love to other side(be it male or female) even if there exist no one? What you think, is it worth or futile endevour being with someone ...
A. 27 September 2007: It wouldn't be enough for me, but everyone is different. I would be very disappointed and unfulfilled if I loved someone so much, and knew they didn't feel the same way about me. I think it's much richer when it flows both ways. Don't settle for ... (read in full...)
Is it better to have lost in love than to never have loved at all?
Q. Is it really better to have lost in love than to never have loved at all? If so, why does it hurt so bad....
A. 27 September 2007: Yes!... (read in full...)
I like going out, he's a homebody! How can we make this work?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been living together for two years. We have always had different 'lifestyles' but it has started to become a problem. I am very social and like to do things and go out with friends. He likes to stay at home. Anyone have ...
A. 27 September 2007: As long as he lets you have the freedom to go out when you want to, it may not be an issue. I was involved with a guy like this once and at first, I chalked it up to "opposites attract" and he did let me go out with my friends without throwing a ... (read in full...)
My husband to be says he just doesn't need to have sex... ?
Q. my soon to be husband says he just doesn't have to have sex? my fiance and i have been together a bit under a year now and a few months into our relationship i started noticing him not wanting to be as intimate as we had to begin with..i have bee...
A. 27 September 2007: I am seeing a guy who is kind of like this. For one thing, he does have high blood pressure and is on medication for it so I think some of his waned sex drive could be connected to this problem. At times, he's insatiable. And other times he ... (read in full...)
I think my guy has everything.. worry if he is using the "not ready" thing as an excuse for a casual affair or not?!
Q. I have been seeing this guy about three months, in the beginning he came on quite strong, telling me he wanted to take care of me...etc...pursued me. We knew each other about four years, he got out of a terrible breakup last year...and finally the ...
A. 27 September 2007: I think he's still dealing with the break up of his last relationship and has not worked through that grief/pain just yet. He seems to be throwing himself into work as a way of warding off depression which I think he's battling. He enjoys having ... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Wanted, your ideas for features and improvements!
Q. Hi I'm looking to get some input from everyone on what you'd like to see on the site. How can I make it easier to use? What new features would you like to see? Any annoyances or bugs you'd like to fix? Can I make the moderati...
A. 27 September 2007: At the moment, can't think of a thing. I think this is the greatest site and it seems to function really well. I've had no problems with it at all but if I come up with any brainstorms, I'll let you know. :-)... (read in full...)
My ex has a new girlfriend - how he's ignoring me! I'm deeply hurt - what should I do?
Q. My ex is ignoring me! We broke up several years ago but have always remained friends, but for the past year or so, I know he's been seeing another woman. I've never met her but I hear she's beautiful and he's very much in love. The problem ...
A. 26 September 2007: Hi hon,
Well it seems like you've been deluding yourself for quite sometime, thinking this man still had feelings for you because he remained friends. Perhaps you held on to some kind of false hope that the two of you would eventually get back toge... (read in full...)
My ex hinted he would tell my husband if I didn't continue the affair. How do I tell my husband without damaging the marriage?
Q. Help, I'm married and have kids. I recently ran into an old boyfriend from my teenage years. My husband knows his name (Chris) and what we did (we never had 'all the way' sex, I just performed oral sex on him about 10 times or so). Anyway, ...
A. 25 September 2007: Well there's no way to do that! Since this guy is so manipulative, just tell your husband there's a guy in your class that's coming on too strong and hasn't been too happy that you've said "no" to his advances. That's all he needs to know about ... (read in full...)
My parents want to interfere in my decisions. How do I explain them they affect my independency?
Q. i'v always been the type of person that likes to have independance and make an attempt to do things on my own and if im not able to do something then i will ask for help. the problem is my parents. i'm 26yrs seperated with 3 kids my parents spoil ...
A. 25 September 2007: Since you are an only child, it sounds like you have always been their "whole world". I'm sure they mean well, but they've become a bit over-protective and over-bearing for someone your age. Maybe you can buy them a book on how to enjoy retirement ... (read in full...)
How do I get through to this guy that I'm already committed to my bf??
Q. i have a friend at work who has started showing an intrest in me. have told him from the word go that i have a boyfriend whom i am commited to. He also acknowldges that he has a girlfriend but he only wants to know me better personally. He insists ...
A. 25 September 2007: Stop spending time with him. You're giving out mixed signals. You know the old saying, your lips say, "no, no" but your eyes say "yes, yes". Don't go to lunch with him, don't call him up to chat, don't e-mail him, don't let him come over. If he ... (read in full...)
My husband had an affair and we got through it but he still has pictures of her. Why?
Q. I would like your opinion. I have been with my husband almost 7 years, married 3. We love each other very much I know. But the first year of our marriage he became involved with his employee. He also admitted to me he was 'obsessed'. I don't know ...
A. 24 September 2007: I would delete them. And if he notices it, it'll show you that he does look at them frequently and you'll then have an opportunity, since he brought it up, to ask him why he still felt the need to hang onto pictures of her. If he never brings it ... (read in full...)
Am I being stupid?
Q. Am I being stupid? I have a great wife, who is a great mother with our children and in 12 years we have never had bad problems. My problem is that she had a couple of relationships in high school and as she says she was "forced to have sex". ...
A. 20 September 2007: Okay since you are so completely thick-headed on this subject, let's look at it from another angle. Let's assume for the sake of argument that your wife did have consensual sex with these past boyfriends, of 12 years ago. Judging by the way you ... (read in full...)
He sent her a picture of his penis!
Q. There's this site that should be left un-named where you can sell items and a whole bunch of other things are on this site including a personals section.... well I was looking through my boyfriends email box earlier since he's always doing it to me ...
A. 16 September 2007: Have you confronted him about it? I suggest you do so. It sounds like he's been cheating, or planning to anyhow. Yes, I'd be worried.... (read in full...)
Will he tell his wife about the affair???
Q. Hi, I became very good friends with my neighbour who was (is) in a very unhappy marriage. He did not even need to tell myself, my husband of 9 years (at the time)or our tennant. She mistreats and isolates him as badly as my ex mistreated and i...
A. 16 September 2007: I think you have bigger problems than worrying about your b/f's wife and whether her friendship with the neighbor is going to be damaged. You and this man cannot continue this charade any longer. If he is unhappy in his marriage, as he claims to ... (read in full...)
Am I being stupid?
Q. Am I being stupid? I have a great wife, who is a great mother with our children and in 12 years we have never had bad problems. My problem is that she had a couple of relationships in high school and as she says she was "forced to have sex". ...
A. 16 September 2007: These incidents happened over 12 years ago and prior to your marriage. Why in the world would this subject have even come up at this point and become such a huge problem? Your wife is not in high school anymore and hasn't been for more than 12 ... (read in full...)
All of a sudden he wanted space after 3 years, is it over?
Q. I was living with my boyfriend for almost 3 years and all of a sudden he wanted space, so i moved out. Two weeks later he said that it was best that we weren't together. We have an awesome relationship and get along great and talked about the ...
A. 16 September 2007: He may have met someone else. Men who back stroke this fast have usually been cheating on you for awhile and realized it's time to pull the plug. Sorry for the sad news but you'll find someone else and be just fine. Take care. xoxox... (read in full...)
Fantasy or Nightmare?
Q. I care very much for my girlfriend and I trust her. When we go out with friends, she often finds it fun to make out with her girl friends, especially when she has been drinking. Maybe I am crazy because for many people this would be their fantasy ...
A. 16 September 2007: Talk to her about it, preferrably when she's sober and tell her you don't like it, not even in play. She's probably doing it because she thinks you're getting off on it. Once she realizes it's not something you enjoy watching, maybe she'll quit ... (read in full...)
Am I an idiot for thinking his excuse is plausible? Online dating searches "just for the laugh" ?
Q. I desperately need some advice about my husband. We've been married for almost two years. About 18 months ago I found out that he had registered on an internet dating site, understandably I was furious. He had given detailed descriptions of t...
A. 13 September 2007: Well I hesitate to ever call anyone an idiot but.....in this case, I think you are being buffaloed. Your husband isn't happy being married. He may be coming home every night. He may be going through the motions, doing what everyone is expecting ... (read in full...)
Most of my hubby's friends have stopped talking to him, I think it's because of his need to correct people all the time, which is now very frequent and upsetting.
Q. I'm having a problem with my husband. He always feels the need to correct EVERYONE about almost EVERYTHING they say. For example, I'll say that the sky is blue and he'll "correct" me by saying that it's cyan. Or if a friend says that they're col...
A. 13 September 2007: Well, it's a bit extreme, but why don't you plant a tape-recorder near an area where the two of you might be sitting and talking one evening, and just start the conversation like you would normally, and see how many times during the span of this ... (read in full...)
I think my marriage is in trouble. Please tell me what you think.
Q. Here is my story, I have been married for just over 2 years. My husband and I dated off an on for 3 years before we got marrried. We now have a son (16 months). Our marriage has never been very strong. We still have seperate checking accounts ...
A. 11 September 2007: Consider going to couples counseling with your spouse first, before you throw in the towel. Just because your pharmacy friend is showing you some attention, and seems to be your dream man, does not mean he won't have his own weird issues once you ... (read in full...)
My husband tires to be Superman, helping everybody where it's needed... But it's really hurting me!!
Q. My husband always tries to be a knight in shining armer. Hes always stops things we are doing as a family or together to go of and save some one so to speak. Some examples are: at 11oclock at night his sister (who lives 3 1/2) miles away phoned t...
A. 11 September 2007: Your husband is an over-achiever, always seeking approval from some invisible source, such as his subconscious. It probably stems from his childhood. Could it be that he was the oldest child, and always felt responsible for everything and had to ... (read in full...)
Any tips on controlling acne?
Q. well my problem is i keep gietting these annoying little out breaks of spots. my skin isnt bad, but its not the clearest. i use cleanser, tonner and moisturiser but i still get really oily skin and a fair few spots. i ws just wondering if any...
A. 11 September 2007: If you wear make-up apply it with a sponge, never use your hands/fingers, just adds more oil to your face. Change the sponge often, like once a week. They're cheap, you can buy them at a drugstore. Wash your face twice a day. Once in the morning, ... (read in full...)
I'm 11 and me and my girlfriend keep breaking up. Should we be together? Help please.
Q. me and my girlfreind keep breaking up and getting back together over and over should we be together i am eleven...
A. 30 August 2007: No probably not. Make a clean break and find other friends. You have so many years ahead of you to focus on relationships. You are too young to be serious about anyone, no matter how it feels right now. Good luck.... (read in full...)
I helped a mate out when they split from their partner. Now they're interested in me but I'm married! Help!
Q. I'm in a predicament partially of my own making and I don't know the way out. I'm pretty certain I'm confused. I've been married/involved for the past decade. A friend of mine has been going through some rough times with his relationship of ...
A. 30 August 2007: Then tell him just what you've told us with the same heart-felt explanation that you put into your last two sentences. It's simple, it's straight-forward and it shows that while you appreciate his attention, you know it cannot go further. I'm sure ... (read in full...)
My guy doesn't seem interested anymore. What do you think?
Q. Hi there, well could anyone help me. Ive been with this bloke for 5 months now and yeah i really like him, but recently hes been messing with ma head. Two weeks ago we had a big arguement over another girl (i was drunk) well after that ngt i text...
A. 30 August 2007: Okay, it's time to lay everything on the line. Send him an e-mail and tell him that you care about him, but you're not into games. If he wants to continue seeing you, things have to change. You want to be able to see him each day (if that's ... (read in full...)
I have been having sex with a married man. He says he loves me and his family. Could he just be after sex?
Q. i have a colleague at work who is married with a 3 year old kid..i was new and got atrracted to him, i was the only one single in the office and many guys wants to court me, but i fell inlove with this married man and we see each other secretly,we ...
A. 30 August 2007: Yup. Most definately. You'd be wise to cut this tie and start dating one of the single guys who is interested in you. Or change jobs. This will never be anything more than an affair and you will end up heart-broken. Good luck.... (read in full...)
I want to move in together and he doesn't. how do we get around this problem?
Q. I want to move in together and he doesn't. My boyfriend and i have been together for about a year and 7 months. This is my first serious relationship. We both live in the same city but in different apartments. I spend about 3 quarters of my time at ...
A. 29 August 2007: You simply ask him. The next time your unpacking your things say, "Tell me something.....what is it about living together that scares you (turns you off, freaks you out, you fill in the blanks)....?" You'll never know until you simply ask. ... (read in full...)
My mother hasn't spoken to me in a month and has been telling my children lies!
Q. A liitle confused. My mother hasn't been speaking to me for over a month due to the fact that I went back to my ex who she doesn't like. Mind you I have two boys ages 12 and 6 who she has been putting stuff in their heads which I think is not right ...
A. 29 August 2007: You might just be better off distancing yourself from her, however sad that may be. She will eventually turn your boys against you if she's filling their heads with lies, and bashing your character. She may be your mother, but she neither respects ... (read in full...)
I want to move in together and he doesn't. how do we get around this problem?
Q. I want to move in together and he doesn't. My boyfriend and i have been together for about a year and 7 months. This is my first serious relationship. We both live in the same city but in different apartments. I spend about 3 quarters of my time at ...
A. 29 August 2007: No, quite the opposite. Alot of them are pushing for us to move in before we're ready. You didn't mention what reasons your b/f gave you for NOT wanting the two of you to live together, so it's hard to figure out what's up. If he's considering ... (read in full...)
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