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Why he didn't call me back after spending a great time together?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 December 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 27 December 2010)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I'm a very attractive girl and I've been texting with this guy for a while. last week we went out and had a great time together. I know he liked me. We kissed, hugged but when he drove me home I didn't invite him in. After kissing inside the car I sad goodnight and left.

I thought he would call me next day but he didn't. I texted him and he was very sweet in his responses but didn't ask me out again or text me after that.

What went wrong? I could feel that he was very into me.

That happens with another guy before. Do I scare them for been an independent woman with a great carrier? Or the fact of been happy with my single life?

View related questions: kissing, text

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A male reader, PM Canada +, writes (27 December 2010):

PM agony auntI second Cerberus' suggestion. The thing that's important here is not why he hasn't asked you out yet but that you like him and want to see him again and if you want to see him again, you need to call him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010):

Your turn now, why don't you set up the next date?

Look we have no idea why he didn't call or why he isn't outside your window now playing a song on the guitar serenading you.

I'm one of those "don't act too keen" guys. I take it very slowly and casually but I wait a couple of days after dates to open up contact again. I want to look busy, look like I have an interesting life and that I'm not desperate to see the person again. Although I do love when they text me whenever they want and always respond.

I wouldn't read too deeply into things at this early stage. Assume nothing and if you want something then you make the move. If you want to see him again then ask him out. Some guys just don't take that much of an initiative even though traditionally we're supposed to do all the early work and pay for everything, some guys just aren't that good at it.

Don't make this a big deal, just ask him to meet up with you.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (27 December 2010):

kenny agony auntIt could be that he really likes you and is just playing it abit cool and does not want to appear too keen. You said it all went very well on the date, you had a great time, hugged, kissed, and thats good. Relax about the whole thing, maybe give it a a few day's then just send a text, or call to ask how he is. You said that you are a very attractive girl, it could be that he thinks most guy's normally call you an hour after the first date, and he just diden't want to appear that eager. Take it easy and have fun with all of this, these beginning parts of relationships are invarible the most fun.

Good luck x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010):

Hi!

When you invite them in, it's possible they are getting the wrong message from you. They may assume you want to sleep with them or just have coffee or a drink when they do wanna sleep with you. It could be either or. Do you let them know of your intentions when you invite them in? If so, and they politely decline, then Id say they are just taking things slow and if they respond, thats a good thing cause it shows continued interest. Why not ask this guy out again with a phone call? Go for it! Good luck.

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