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I want to end this for good, but I can't.

Tagged as: Friends, Sex, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 April 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 April 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I don't know what to do. I am 16 and totally in love with this boy. He abuses me. Hits me, as well as emotionally. He constantly puts me down and calls me names. We go to a vocational school so when we're on the bus, it's for an hour and a half at a time. We sit with each other and "secretly" hold hands and just talk to each other. But he doesn't want any of his friends to know about "us." We're not dating, we never have. He calls us friends with benefits. Sadly, it's true.

We only get together to have sex, but I back out every time just because I want to be with him. We haven't done it yet, but I just agree so he'll come over and I could kiss him. I love his kisses and his hugs and just being with him physically. He doesn't feel the same. I finally got up the nerve to ask him, and he said he is starting to like me more and more, but he "doesn't think" we could have a relationship.

I told one of my friends. I want to end this for good, but I can't. I really think I love him. She told me I need to leave him, but I wish it were that easy. Should I give him a chance again, or just not deal with it? If I were to leave him, how would I do it? Help!

View related questions: friend with benefits, puts me down

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2009):


Ask him what he wants. If he's unable to clearly answer you, then, he's highjacking you. He owns you. Just leave'm and move on! It's all about your future.

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A male reader, andrew loves hali United States +, writes (22 April 2009):

andrew loves hali agony auntif he hits you how could you love him? fu**ed up. just leave him and im pretty sure you dont love him. and just dont talk to him im pretty sure he'll get the clue unless he's stupid.

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A female reader, lorenah89 United States +, writes (22 April 2009):

You need to get out of the relationship before it gets any worst. Trust me no boy is worth the abuse. I should know i have been in an abusive relationship myself and i know it's hard. I know you feel like giving him a chance convincing yourself that he could change but truth be told he will not change. This guy that abused me later went to abuse his next girlfriend which i found out through a mutual friend. Trust me just leave him alone you deserve better!!!

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A female reader, sexyredlovesporter United States +, writes (22 April 2009):

Please stop! What you're feeling is not love. Move on, he doesn't even really like you... and nobody deserves to be abused NOT even you! You're still young, boys will come and go, please do the smart thing and leave him the hell alone. Why would you want to be with someone that is mean to you and only really wants you for sex? Please move on, and that cannot be love, love makes you happy not one bit sad. MOVE ON!! good luck

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