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How do I overcome this and learn to feel better about myself?

Tagged as: Friends, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 November 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 2 December 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

like 5 months ago a guy i reallllly like sat their after we came from a party where i got really drunk! he sat in his house with his friends and told them how he thinks im boring.. this still hurts my feelings up till this day. i dont know if because he said it to his friends in general or because he said it he has said it to me before but this time i went on his facebook and saw that another guy made a statement about it. even though they didnt say my name im 100% sure that they were talkin about me. then the friend said we need to make up some more nicknames for these girls. im not like the other girls, im a virgin and have no intentions of sleeping with any of them but after this party this same guy who called me boring was constantly at my house telling me how much he likes me and being all sweet with my family. oh lol he is a cheater i donttt want to be with him in a relationship and i just have not been able to forgive him cuz it makes me wonder what else was said about me.

I am very shy and self conscious and at one point all the guys liked me and i rejected them so i know they probably used that as an oppurtunity to attack me. PLEASE help. how do i feel better about myself? i already go out with friends and hang out but after all the hanging out is done it plays on my mind cause i like him.... how do i get over him and feel better about myself????

View related questions: drunk, facebook, shy

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A female reader, bolligcheryl United States +, writes (2 December 2009):

its gonna take awhile hun... just take slow steps. its hard. and guys only say oh shes boring because they want a reckless girl to take advantage of. or a girl who will have sex with them. relax and enjoy your life day by day. :D if you need anything let me know.

love and light

Cheryl

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

aw thanks guys but y does he think i am boring? nd im tryin hard to ignore him we go to church nd school together smh. but i really wannq get over him he is nothing but a player and a flirt. i already hang out with other people but at the end i still dream about him any advice???

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A female reader, tjazzy Nigeria +, writes (1 December 2009):

It's unfortunate that you got drunk that day, but what I think is that all those guys are not mature enough for you. Widen the scope of your friends and meet others outside you age group. Get active young lady - Get a gym membership and work out all that pent up emotion, enroll in a cooking class or an acting class and distract yourself from the guy or get involved in church or some voluntary organization. Take your mind off guys and onto yourself. You sound like a very intelligent person.

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A female reader, bitch United States +, writes (1 December 2009):

This is a crush you have on him honey. You are very young and in your lifetime you will experience many "crushes" on many guys. This won't be the first or last crush you have. And what he said about you would hurt anybody's feelings. I am sure you are not boring at all. But at this young man's age, all they think about is sex because of the high levels of hormones they have surging through their body and you should not feel dejected by his comment at all. You really should be proud of yourself for not just making out or having sex with every and any boy that propositions you. Keep your clothes on and let them say what they will, it doesn't matter because you come out the winner in the end by being true to yourself!

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A female reader, bolligcheryl United States +, writes (1 December 2009):

ignore them hun. dont let them break you. out of personal experience i know its hard. it really is. all you need to know is that no matter what you are beautiful. i dont care what you look like. your always beautiful in atleast one way. okay hun do something for me ok. go to your mirror. look at yourself. look at your smile. your eyes. your teeth. hair. think of your personality and your laugh. now think of 5 things that you love or atleast like about yourself. and remember what you decide is what you live with forever. when the time is right you will know it. make sure your mentally physically and emotionally ready. if you have other questions please dont hesitate to ask me. im open to whatever answers you need even what happened to me. email me anytime at [email address blocked]

be safe and be strong hun.

Cheryl

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