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age
30-35,
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writes: I’m a young gay guy and I feel like a crap right now. I’m in love with my straight classmate. It’s so hard for me that I’m literary breaking down. Of course, he doesn’t love me back. He has a girlfriend, and seems that he’s happy with her. I know I should be happy for him, but I just can’t. I want him for myself, although I know very well that it’ll never happen. He knows about my feelings. Actually I wasn’t going to tell him, but somehow he found out from our mutual friend. I thought that he’ll never want to see me again, because I’ve heard him putting down gay guys before. But he was very nice and kind. He said that he understands and doesn’t mind me being gay. After that we’ve never talked about that again. I’ve tried so hard to forget him. However, it’s not working. I just don’t see anybody else, it’s just him. I’ve never been so in love. I try not to think about him, but every time I see him with his girl, my heart breaks in thousand pieces. It hurts everyday because I know we’ll never be together. I try to avoid him as much as I can, I rejected when he invited me to his birthday party, I quit our school's football team, because he's there. I even studied abroad for half a year and there were many nice guys, but I never forgot him. I feel like I cannot live like this any longer. I would love to drive away somewhere where I’ll never see him again. What should I do?
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male
reader, nordiboi  +, writes (31 October 2012):
I am currently going through something very simular. Now with a little more tact than the others, you like me, we have to sadly accept that the dream of you two together isn't going to come true. Like you, I have fallen for a straight friend of mine, and sadly yes it does hurt, but the pain does start to subside. Sadly though I can't tell you when or how long the feelings you have will last. But the first step is acceptance of where you two stand. More importantly it is a level of respect there too. I have to remind myself that I can't wish or make make him gay just like people can't wish or make me straight. Secondly you have to remember that there are tons of people out here in the world. Don't believe that he is your only chance at love, because that simply isn't true. Lastly, make sure that you have fallen in love with yourself because when you really start to show it, THAT WILL ATTRACT people to YOU. So dust yourself off little buddy, because it happens to the best of us, and take another look around and you may be suprised as to who is actually taking a interest in you and wants to be with you!Best of luck buddy and remember that it will get better.
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male
reader, Lies  +, writes (7 October 2012):
-He accepts you for who you are-You guys are still friends-He did not react violently as on other peopleThat being said, I think the best solution is to move on. Try to get your mind off him. I know when I had my first gay crush on a straight guy and the pain that follows, but it gets better, trust me. Talk to your friends more, go watch more movies or listen to happy music. It may be really hard to understand this but you just have to think of the future. There will always be a better guy for you that will love you back unconditionally. Wish you the best of luck,Lies
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male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave  +, writes (1 October 2012):
You just have to get on with your life and stop moping. Nothing will ever happen between you two.
Quitting the football team or not going to his party isn't going to solve anything - you're just avoiding him and that's an immature way out. It's like burying your head in the sand.
You know you cant have him, but you're not accepting that because you won't/don't want to let go. This is a crush on something you can't have and it normally makes you focus on that and nothing else.
Moving on is accepting the situation while still being in contact and knowing it is just a friends thing.
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female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (1 October 2012):
 What should you do? You should stop acting all angsty and get over it. He is straight, he has a girlfriend, what you have is a crush, or even lust, but it is not love.
While attraction to another can be instantaneous, and while love can grow from that instant attraction it takes two people to nurture love into being.
As long as you are prepared to 'love' somebody who is unattainable you don't have to put yourself out there to find the real stuff .... so you can either continue with your 'oh woe is me, I've given up so much for him, made so many sacrifices including quitting the football team and not going to his birthday party and my widdle widdle heart is breaking" act, or acknowledge you are avoiding the real world, and the highs and lows of real relationships.
By being in love and having your heart broken you are able to avoid having to make decisions and take action in the real world.
Grow up, and get over it! Leave him to live his life and stop stalling on yours!
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