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How can I get him to speak to me to tell my why he don't call or text me anymore?

Tagged as: Faded love, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 September 2006) 5 Answers - (Newest, 1 October 2006)
A female , anonymous writes:

it prob sounds stupid, but i havent spoke 2 my ex 4 abpout 3 monthes, ive text him and called him but he doesnt answer me, ive called him before on private he answered and heard it was me and pretended he couldnt hear me which pissed me off, but how can i get him 2 contact me i just want him 2 tell me WHY he dont call me or text me i love him i know i hav 2 get ova him but its impossible until i know why.

View related questions: my ex, text

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2006):

It hurts, its frustrating that he is ignoring you.

Sorry to say, the answer is simple: he is not responding to your calls and emails because.......he just does not want to.

Why doesn't he want to? Well, no matter who ended it, the fact is, your relationship is over. You and he are no longer bf/gf. Did he tell you at the time of the break-up why he was ending it? Unless you were the one to finish.

Anyway, even if he had explained why he broke up, it still would have hurt just as much, right? Would knowing why have really satisfied you?

The way to get over this is to stop thinking that you love him, and stop wanting an explanation. The way to do THAT is to turn your attention to other things! Your friends, family, work or school, activities you enjoy! What I'm saying is to get your mind busy so that you don't have time to upset yourself with thoughts like you are describing! You just have to accept that its finished, you cannot make him contact you, and continue on with your life!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2006):

Well, we have all been here I think...and the best thing to do is not to let him know that you are mad at him for not responding to you...maybe he is avoiding you because he does care but does not want to care so he can move on with someone new...Maybe you can just keep in touch by sending him a friendly message once in awhile, but don't ask him why he is not calling or responding or how he feels, that way when he is ready to contact you he will..and in the meantime you just have to get busy finding someone new and doing the things you enjoy and not think about him all of the time, because it won't bring him back anyway...if he sees you are OK without him, he may be more intriqued or start to worry that you are moving on from him.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2006):

(im the original poster of this) i have text him asking him Why and he is ignoring me im so frustrated but i cant move on... it probably sounds really sad but its true i wanna put my mind at risk

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A female reader, Toria +, writes (30 September 2006):

Toria agony auntWell you make someone talk to you I'm afraid and if he isn't calling or texting you anymore then you aren't going to be able to ask the question until he does call or text.

Maybe you could text him and just say something like I know we are over but I just need to know why, this information will help me move on and not make the same mistake with someone else, he may not reply but at least he will know that you aren't contacting him to get back together and if he still cares about you he might contact you to tell you this stuff you want to know so you can move on.

Good luck :o)

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A female reader, Keeley +, writes (30 September 2006):

Keeley agony auntHiya

Firstly let me say no quesion is a stupid question when it comes to relationships. They are hard enough to deal with.

As you have not given to much info like was your relationship in trouble at any stage or was everything fine and he just slipped away?!?!?!?!?!

Either way I was in a similiar position as you however, FINALLY managed to speak to him and I guess he just told me what I wanted to hear but I am wiser now and will not allow myself to fall faul of this situation again.

I guess what I am trying to say is well as someone once said to me "how's that saying go? something about letting the bird fly away, if he comes back on his own, he is yours to keep...if he doesn't come back then he wasn't yours to begin with...?"

Only your heart and head can help you get through this butI think you know, like I did, deep down what has happened to you - take some time out and reflect for a short time them get back on with your life. As much as you want to hear him say it, trust me, if he is ignoring you like this he never will tell you.

So sorry babe - chin up we're with you.

Big love

Keeley

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