A
female
age
41-50,
*driana2
writes:Hello, I need help.I have been married for 6 years with 2 kids, and it is safe to say I am the sole caregiver for my kids, my husband pretty much sits and watches. Like a stranger and every now and then would either criticize what am doing or yell at one of them. I do work so does he, he makes more money than me, guess he feels justified not helping at home. But here is the thing same thing happens in the bed room , he is on the small side , having orgasm with him is out of the question , I pretty much have to do it myself .I take blame for not wanting to bruise his ego by not out rightly telling him is not working in the bedroom earlier. As the years went on I added some weight, so did he, he now just rolls on top do his thing after 2 mins and tells me " oh this has to stop happening " but nothing changes when I tell him we need to make changes he tells me oh it is my weight or if I could give him oral sex or am too tense.Nothing is his fault.He has to be right By the way nothing is wrong with my libido which I told him as well. so this year I went and ordered some books, toys etc because I wasn't about to have mediocre sex yet again this year with him getting off .His response was you mean " we have to finish reading this book first" there was no sign that he wants to work together on this, rather he is busy blaming me or something else. I have had it up to here. Very frustrating not only is he useless when it comes to chores and the kids but nothing as well in the bedroom, I just feel resentment has sent in on my part or at least am getting there
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (14 January 2013):
 sorry but earning more than you does not give him the right to sit back and do nothing in your home if you both work full time.
My hubby earns way less than me. he has his chores and I have mine... granted mine are more than his but I'm ok with it.
as for sex....
do you really think that penis size has much to do with pleasure? I don't.
if you have both gained weight and are ok with that then you need new positions.
do you guys have necking and petting? do you have oral sex both giving and getting? if not why not?
it sounds to me like if you don't get some counseling this is the beginning of the end of your marriage.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2013): Well I am sorry to be so negative, but you are looking for your husband to have a radical personality change, and it doesn't look likely.
I think it will have to be the ultimatum: If he wants it to work then things will have to change.
You will soon have your answer about how much he values you and the relationship.
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