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female
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*sylyn
writes: My boyfriend and i have 2 children and have broken up. We are still living in the same house because i quit my job and gave up my apartment for him. he says he is confused and doesnt know what he wants and neither do i. how do i handle this situation to make it more comfortable for everyone
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female
reader, Italie  +, writes (18 December 2006):
 Hi
I'm in the same position and have been for the past month. We split up but he cant afford to move out.
If you are definite that you will not be getting back together then you both need to sit down together (calmly), discuss where you want to be in a years time and make plans to move in that direction e.g. you contacting the council to be added to the waiting list for a house in which case you'll at least feel as though something is happening and you are tyring to move on. It's very difficult as you have children but in this case you would have to spend as much time apart as possible e.g. get a tv in his bedroom or one of you take the children out. When you have to be together then you need to be civil for the childrens sake. Any hostility will be picked up and detrimental to the children.
If there is a possibility you may get back together then you have to treat him as you would a friend and keep things as amicable as possible. There is no way you will get back together if you are hostile/arguing or being petty. My issue is whether or not my ex is going to start going out with someone else. I have no clue how i'd cope with that - dont think I could.
It's really hard - I swing one day to the next from 'it's over - i'm going to keep away from him' and 'we might get back together so I'll stay friendly'. I have a 5 year old (not his) so I'm tied to the house at nights but you need to remember he is still their Dad and you need to do whatever keeps them happy.
Sorry i couldnt be much more help. If my situation changes and I get an answer I'll let you know.
Chin up!!
Italie
A
female
reader, ksylyn +, writes (18 December 2006):
ksylyn is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSomebody please help this situation is soooooooooo awkward.
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