A
male
age
41-50,
*eartbroken in love
writes:I am in love with this girl I have talked to online for going on 3 years now that I recently met face to face. At the beginning of this year while in college she met this guy that she was all into and they started sleeping together. He has a GF though and so yes he is cheating on her with this girl I am in love with. We talk everyday and she knows exactly how I feel but claims she doesn't feel the same way. We refuse to let each other go and though she has since come to reality with this guy she has been sleeping with she still give into him from time to time. Me and her have never been intimate. I get a lot of mixed signals from her though that there may be a chance for us to have a more intimate relationship. It hurts because I love this girl with everything I have and want to do everything for her. I need advice from girls mostly if I can that maybe have at one point had a guy in thier lives like me that loved them regardless of anything they could put on the table. I need to know what can I do to find out some answers. Just simply coming out and asking doesn't seem like the best way right now as I will only get the answer as it applies to the current period in time. The answer today would be along the lines of "I don't know what the future holds but I do love you as a friend". I am looking for advice on how to decipher the future prospects for me and her. Please help. What signals can I look for and what can I do to help me interpret the future prospects. If anyone is truely interested in helping me and would like any addional information please feel free to message me.This is actually a follow up question to my last question. Thanks in advance[Moderator's note: You must post follow ups/updates at the same page as an initial question. Please do so in the future.]
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male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (19 July 2009):
 She wants you for the emotional side, and keep this guy to meet her physical needs. She is giving you an indication by wanting to remain in contact with you she cares, but not too much. For she still goes back to the guy who has the GF, and she is giving you every hint that to be the case. She has already told you she does not have the same feelings...why waste another second on her?
why put up with this? she's been sleeping with him, and you've met her in real life once. I understand that the pain is real, but in reality what do you have? If you are going to be waiting for her to see this thing through, you will be waiting a long time.
Best to get out and date someone near you. Move on. She is taking you for granted, and will continue to give you false hope if you continue to let her. Don't let her.
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