A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I let this girl know I was interested in her and we had a group date. I found out that she was just getting over someone afterward and that she was depressed. She called me a few days later and told me that she was afraid it seemed like she was pushi9ng me away put she didnt want that. She pretty much said that when she was ready to date again she would let me know.My question is: How should I go about this. I was going out of my way to talk to her at work but some people I talk to said thats what I shouldnt do. They said I should only say "Hi" to her and only talk to her when she starts a conversation with me. Is this good advice? Im afraid that if I do this she will think I lost interest in her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFinal Update:
Well guys I have to say thank you to you all.
We had a talk today and we have everything sorted out. Once she is done with college we are going to be together.
Thank you all for your help!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUpdate again:SO I had the party today. Everybody had a ton of fun and she really seemed to enjoy herself. The only ting that concerns me right now is that Im wondering if she likes our friend from work more than she likes me. I wonder this because she seems to act more friendly with him. This could however be just because I asked her outbefore and she doesnt want me to think shes ready. She did however invite us to visit her at her dorm. She also plans to come over again Saturday.Overall the party ended with me feeling conflicted. She was more friendly with me this time than usual (She even said thank you very much and hugged me before she left )But I cant shake this feeling about my friend. I asked my friend what he thought and he said He didnt get that from her but he doesnt sense that stuff very well. He also said that it didnt really matter anyway because he doesnt like her.
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female
reader, cougheyqueen54  +, writes (25 August 2007):
 I'd say to keep an interest and in contact with her, but if she's not ready to date- start going out and maybe meeting other girls. You might come to find someone you like more. Plus if she doesn't get over this guy and goes back to him, you'll have a back-up, or maybe even something better. Go with friends and enjoy yourself, meet some more women. And that doesn't mean you are "betraying" her, it's more like killing time. Don't pine for her too much, no matter how much you think you like her.Just keep conversations at work short but sweet, compliment her at times if your comfortable doing so. The party is a nice way to show her you care. Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have somewhat of an update but I think I require more advice.First off it turns out she is going to start going to a local college and she will not be at work anymore. This cuts off any means I have of seeing her other than calling her.What I have done so far is :A.) Got a card and had everyone at work sign it.B.) Am planning a going away party for her at my house this sundayC.) Im buying balloons and making her a cakeHopefully these seem like good ideas to you guys. The area I think I need advice on however is this:Once she actually is gone (not far but still) I will not be able to see her much at all. Should I call her every now and then? I also want to know if she is still planning on telling me when she is ready to date again.I probablly wont see her again for 2 months because she will begin work again in winter. Im just not sure what I should do.Thank you guys in advance.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys. That sounds like perfect advice for the situation. If something happens I will probably update here. =)
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A
female
reader, ruby19 +, writes (6 August 2007):
You dont want to over do it, but you still want to flirt with her a little bit. Girls love getting attention expecially by a guy that really likes her. She told you that she was some what interested when she told you she would let you know when she was ready to date again, but dont completely blow her off because it was just get awkward. plus by flirting with her it may make her "ready" sooner. try to talk to her, but dont get into her business to much.
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