A
female
age
30-35,
*istoka
writes:I am 18 but when I was 15 I had a bf who tried 2 make luv 2 me but he didn't enter, I bled a bit, he tried it over 6 times sometimes I bled, sometimes I didn't. I am worried coz I don't know if I am still a virgin. I was dating both A and B but B was the one who tried 2 make love 2 me, I broke up with him coz I was scared. Now A is asking gor sex but I am not yet ready but not sure if I am a virgin or not. A respects my view but what if he waits and finds out I'm not a virgin? I've never felt what it's like to have sex but I am scared. I need help! Am I a virgin or not?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2010): In law the slightest penetration is sufficient for rape.
I think the same applies here.
I entered a girl just a little once. I'm sorry to say this, but yes, I took her vaginity and I lost mine.
She was in love with me but I could see she was not ready for what I wanted.
She had to live with it and she is a well adjusted lady today.
As for me, it was nice but I'm sorry I took it from her in that way.
I don't know whether she ever told the guy who is now her husband.
A
female
reader, YourDestiny11  +, writes (24 March 2010):
 Well if u bled that means he popped ur "cherry" which is considered losing ur virginity. My advice to u is to tell a right away...if he finds out ur lying later then things could end badly. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2010): There will be some people who tell you to just be quiet and Mr. "A" doesn't need to know about it.
But there is a problem with that: If "B" has any STDs, you've potentially been exposed to them.
You're lying if you pretend that having sex with "A" in the future would not risk exposing him. (And not all STDs can even be tested for.) Mr. "A" has the right to know and there's no way around it.
What you experienced does not sound very much like "sex" to me. Your hymen may have been broken and that technically means your virginity is gone. But mentally I don't think it counts.
Just tell "A" the truth.
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A
female
reader, EbonyBlossom  +, writes (23 March 2010):
 Technically, you didn't actually have sex, so you're a virgin. Breaking your hymen doesn't equal losing your virginity. You can break your hymen for loads of reasons like physical exercise or inserting a tampon. He shouldn't care whether you are a virgin or not. Just tell him you used to be intimate with the other guy, and if he doesn't like it then he's not worth it.
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