A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm going on holiday next week. I a 20 year old man and I'm single. I have been single for over a year now, and I am now growing bored of single life. To be honest, I have never really been happy being single since my first girlfriend left me. However, this holiday has the potential to change all that. I have no plans to get into a relationship, because I feel that would be foolish given that if I did get involved with somebody down there we would be faced with a long distance relationship. What I AM hoping for while I'm away is that I might find somebody to have a good time with.Can anybody suggest anything that I could do while I'm away? I'll be going to a popular seaside town, where there is a lot of nightlife. So, clubs will be a must! Just wondered if there is anything I could do to increase my chances of getting with someone while hitting the town?Please don't think of me as some kind of pig for wanting to do something like this. I'm not the sort of guy who would do something like this usually, but as I say - I'm going on holiday, and I want to be spontaneous! (And of course, I will take protection with me)
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male
reader, Mark25 +, writes (26 July 2008):
 I didn't make my point very clear. Sorry about that. I know you said that wouldn't have one night stands when you were at home but I was just trying to explain that it would be better if you could find someone to love or make friends with rather than have a one night stand. We all sex. It's a normal part of being human. A year's not that long. There are people on this site who are still virgins. How do you think they feel? The anonymous writer who wrote in was spot on. Make friends and you're guaranteed a great holiday with lots of fun. Sex is not the be all and end all of life.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank-you anon, that's very good advice. If nothing else, I will feel great for meeting a bunch of great people on my trip. That's a great way of looking at it, and knowing that'll be the very least I get from this holiday makes me feel very good.
And Mark, I did try and explain that "One night stands" (I prefer that term as opposed to "Sleeping around". "Sleeping around" is what I would use to describe cheating on someone), are not something I would usually do. Let me explain a few things - I haven't had sex in a long time. In fact, it has been just over a year and 2 months. Why has it gotten as long as that? I haven't a clue, but the plain truth is, I want it. I've tried waiting for love to come my way, but it hasn't for a very long time, which is a shame because it's something that I want MORE than just sex. I don't see it as an unattractive quality in me. It is purely something that my body wants right now, and it's something that I am going to try to get. Whether it is "clever" or "cool" doesn't really concern me, because I can't think of anywhere in my question where I have so much as suggested that these are reasons why I'm looking for a one night stand. And furthermore, if anything embarrassing happens, well, that's the beauty of taking a vacation alone. None of my friends are going with me. This is my holiday away from everything and everyone in my normal life. And if any information regarding the trip goes back to them it will be through me and me alone.
In return, none of that was suppose to sound harsh, I'm just trying to explain my situation a little better to you.
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A
male
reader, Mark25 +, writes (25 July 2008):
Whether you're going on holiday or not is not an excuse to sleep around. Sorry if I sound harsh. If you want to get with someone for the night then you have to hang around bars and the like. You'll find a lot of girls there just after a quick bunk up. But I can't go without trying to change your mind. Please don't sleep around, even if it's just with one girl. Casual sex is so shallow and loveless that it's a very unattractive quality in someone who participates in it. It isn't clever or cool. Condoms or not or you're still at risk of catching something. And you've got the added worry of brewer's droop. With all the alcohol flowing and the anxiousness of sex with a stranger you may not be able to perform. And then the embarrassment of the situation. I can tell you now girls won't keep quiet and feel sorry for you. They won't be able to wait to tell their friends. Your mates will hear about it and they'll rip you apart. If you meet someone and fall in love you don't have any of those worries. These are very real things that happen that more often than not. Think about what I said.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2008): It's only natural to feel that way, as long as you don't disrespect a girl, I will not classify you as a pig!
From my experience, girls usually decide before they go out at night whether they are going to pull or not. So pay attention to body language: Available girls will look you in the eye and smile a lot. If she palys with her hair whilst talking to you it is a dead give away. Buy her a drink, but don't overdo it...Some girls only flirt to get free booze, and ou don't want to end up bankrupt and sexually frustrated at the same time!
But, in my opinion, you will probably have a better time meeting someone who will stick around for the entire holiday. If you are going away with a group of like minded blokes, you should all try to find a group of single girls to hang out with and do things together. Focus on making friends, even if you don't get any action you will at least have the company of nice people. Good luck!
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