A
female
age
26-29,
*lov3pink
writes:So there's this boy.. And it's probably funny to people how we met, but it was unexpected to happen the way things did. We actually, met over Xbox! and it started w/ us just Playing a game together and we added each other then always played together. Once I got a mic, we were always online talking.. And at the time I didnt even know how he looked.. and I eventually overtime fell for his personality.. Like he made me laugh all the time, smile and everything. Then we seen how each other looked, and he called me beautiful and I thought he was alright.. But then one of our mutual friends called out that we liked each other after some months.. And we finally both admitted it.. And we started talking more and heavily flirting and stuff.. But now it's got to the point where we say I love you.. And he is the sweetest, funniest and nicest person ever.. He comes from a good family and I honestly am confused. We're both 17, and live states away. I want him to seriously stay in my life.. Like I have never met anyone that made me feel so happy.. He really makes me feel worthy. But i don't know how to feel because we are so far away and then on top of that people will probably say stuff on how we are far and never met in real life. I don't know how to feel :/ we aren't rushing a relationship, but we know what we want.. We even talk about a future some.. I don't know what to do about the situation.. and to like keep it going or let it go? :(
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female
reader, MSA +, writes (12 November 2014):
 Babalou nailed it! It is a sweet experience you are going through now and I suggest you continue your friendship with this guy. Don't think too much about being in a relationship or love or your future etc. Just enjoy what you two have now. Continue to chat and play games online. Just enjoy the experience. Two things will eventually happen: #1. You both will move on with life and grow apart. #2. No matter how busy you are with life, you will still find time to keep in touch and grow up together and will always have a special bond regardless of whether you've met or not. I have an online friend I've met many years ago. When we first met, we spent a significant amount of time chatting, web-camming, and on the phone. We felt the 'Love' you are feeling now. But over the years, that 'Love' died and friendship remained. Very solid friendship. We don't talk as much today, and I have a boyfriend. But we still keep in touch on a monthly basis and I can share with him anything and everything. He knows of my boyfriend and my boyfriend is supportive of my friendship with him. We have a very healthy relationship and I truly believe that him and I will still keep in touch and be friends til we grow old.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2014): Ohh, those virtual relationships. No, it's not a real relationship unless you meet someone in person. It's a fantasy, and I would advice to drop it or at least don't call it relationship.
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A
female
reader, babalou  +, writes (12 November 2014):
 Hello.I'm currently in a long distance so I have experience with this subject. When I was 17 and in a long distance relationship, I felt the same as you guys do most likely. I felt in love and very willing to have a future with my boyfriend at the time. However, I think many young people set themselves up for pain when they don't consuder the fact that wanting it is half of the battle. Soon you will both be going off to college, possibly. You have to ask yourselves if this us something you will be capable of pursuing wholeheartedly. My boyfriend at the time was in New York and I was in Missouri. We wanted to see each other but didn't have the time or finances to do so and once we both started college, we became busy and eventually had to get jobs so our time with each other was limited because of things we had to take care of in our own lives. This lead to us communicating less, whether on purpose or not, and eventually things broke off and we naturally met other people. For you to be so young and have a lot of experiences ahead of you to face that will very likely put a strain on your relationship, but still want to lock yourself in a relationship with someone so far away... Well, it's not a good idea. You'll say that even if you can't meet anytime soon, that you love each other and find it worth the wait, but things change very easily in LDRs and you face struggles that wouldn't be an issue if you knew each other in real life. It will not be easy and to be honest, it doesn't often work out from my experience and from the experiences of many people that I know.Long distance relationships are very hard to maintain even when you're older and have the time and money to see each other often, so I'm sure you can imagine how hard it would be once all of these time consuming changes come in the near future. I'm currently in a LDR, and I very strongly believe that our relationship would not have worked out had we met earlier. We met and established a relationship at stable times in our lIves. Many people, including myself, believe that LDR aren't really strong relationships until the people involved have met and spent a decent amount of time together. This is because many people meet and it turns out that there partner is not the same as they imagined them, and I don't mean physically. It's a lot easier to hide pieces of you when you only talk to someone at certain times and in isolated conversations. You don't get to see how the person reacts to everyday occurrences. A friend of mine met her LDR boyfriend after a year and he turned out to be very controlling and hot headed but was always sweet, calm, and relaxed whenever they talked online. It takes meeting a person and spending a significant amount of time with them to really see their personality and not what they want you to see in them. So just remember that LDR are not nearly as easy as you may think they are, even if you find them extremely hard. A bit of distance makes a huge difference.
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