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Dear Cupid > Forums > Cupid's Lounge > Not a lot of people know that . . . . .

Not a lot of people know that . . . . .

, posted over a year ago

IT was necessary to keep a good supply of cannon balls near the cannon on old warships. But how to prevent them from rolling about the deck was the problem.

The best storage method devised was to stack them as a square based pyramid, with one ball on top, resting on four, resting on nine, which rested on sixteen. Thus, a supply of 30 cannon balls could be stacked in a small area right next to the cannon.

There was only one problem - how to prevent the bottom layer from sliding or rolling from under the others. The solution was a metal plate with 16 round indentations, called, for reasons

unknown, a Monkey.

But if this plate were made of iron, the iron balls would quickly rust to it. The solution to the rusting problem was to make them of brass - hence, Brass Monkeys.

Few landlubbers realise that brass contracts much more and much faster than iron when chilled. Consequently, when the temperature dropped too far, the brass indentations would shrink so much that the iron cannon balls would come right off the monkey.

Thus,it was quite literally, cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey. And all this time, you thought that was just a vulgar expression, didn't you?

Posted on 8 October 2008 @ 18:35 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Nah...I knew all that stuff about the brass,

Coz you know... Sis's a smart arse

I also know one more thing Uncy

You could charm the bollocks off a Monkey!

: )

Posted on 8 October 2008 @ 22:5 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Poetry in motion.

Mirror, mirror, on the wall

Who's the sexiest of them all?

Your are Sis, without a doubt

Roger mirror - over and out!

Posted on 8 October 2008 @ 23:31 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Mind you don't trip on that tongue Uncle Phil

With looks like mine you know I could kill,

Still using your charm? - You lecherous flirt

You'd bleedin' say anything for a piece of skirt!

Posted on 8 October 2008 @ 23:54 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I just love you both!you always bring a smile to anyone who reads.God bless you guys!!

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 19:27 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Dearest Bugs you're welcome, my sweet

He loves it when you all bow at his feet

So forget that old git

I've got charm and 'n I've got wit

'Coz I'm the poet that no one can beat!

: )

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 20:46 (London time) - permalink
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pepper27, posted over a year ago

not u 2 again last time u two wrote something it made I cry...They piss about hun and then they say something all cute n soppy n it catches you of gaurd WATCH EM!!!!!!(:0) XXXXXX

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 21:14 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

I'm blowing raspberries atchoo Pepperarmani!

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 21:25 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Sis, you may have charm and wit,

but you're full of.. er.. poetry.

It's too late at night

to be reading all this .. er.. prose.

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 21:57 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Ner Ner,,

You say that it's late, and decided to pass

Any excuse just to save yer arse

Our mariner friend - Phil

Has forgotten the drill

Just salute me - and raise me your glass.

: )

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 22:34 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Just yer glass, Phil, there are kids present! Sheesh man!

: ^ o

Posted on 20 October 2008 @ 22:41 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Pepper Hunny are you jealous??!!

Posted on 23 October 2008 @ 7:57 (London time) - permalink
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pepper27, posted over a year ago

jelly arse! hunny of who? ave I missed something!!!!:)

Posted on 23 October 2008 @ 8:23 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I probably misunderstood "They piss about hun and then they say something all cute n soppy n it catches you of gaurd WATCH EM!!!!!!".no issues!!

Posted on 23 October 2008 @ 14:8 (London time) - permalink
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pepper27, posted over a year ago

no ive got no issues they are very dear friends and it was a joke that they both would understand

Posted on 23 October 2008 @ 20:20 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

okie dokie.this is a great thread.lets not get too serious.prancing about trying to get answers for some of the questions I have read here.My engineering papers were much easier than this.Brrrr.....

Posted on 23 October 2008 @ 20:30 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Bugs - if Pepper is 'Hunny', does that make you 'Bunny'?

Posted on 23 October 2008 @ 23:45 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

it makes me a Bunny who is funny and is a Hunny.Hey it rhymed.not bad heh?:P

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 0:15 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Wun wabbit wun wabbit wun, wun, wun...

You're a bunny, a funny bunny, fun, fun, fun.

You're sweet as hunny, wunny hunny, hun, hun, hun.

Want some hugs bugs? Great big hugs Bugs? Hugs, hugs, hugs.

: ^ D

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 0:42 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Damn.. I can't shoot me wabbits anymore, I might hit Bugs by mistake and I like her a lot... Bigsis, when is it duck season again...(sigh) Shooting things is hard work on DC....

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 1:48 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Hugs back to BigSis.Mwah.Mwah.I guess its dream time for you guys there.Diovan I did find someone with a daffy duck in his avatar.So no shooting ducks either.Shooting anything is hardwork in DC.you are at the end of your wits answering the questions.lol.I love you-to my morn Coffee.:P

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 5:22 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Awww...you tho thweet...

: )

Bugth and Mith D'Lethtat ....Tith neither duck theathon, nor wabbit theathon, but inthtead - I know who I'd like to thoot here on DeeThee! Any Offerth or thuggethgionth?

BigThith

Kith Kith

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 5:37 (London time) - permalink
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pepper27, posted over a year ago

Wot about rat season (not mouse season think of micky) mind you rem roland!!!!!!:) me finks diovan would def go rat season lol!!!!!!

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 9:46 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Nahh...can't eat wat, speshly Woland, mangey old flea-ridden piece of vermin!

I pwefer wabbit or duck!

----------(o"o)--------- .

---oOO--(_)--OOo--.

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 21:2 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Diovan save me.Seems like wabbit shooting is still on!! Can I call you Bug Sis(you can't shoot me then you see!!)

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 21:53 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

(\bs/)

(='.'=)

(')_(')......Awww paw wabbit...gonna be in a stoo tomowwow...hee hee hee...

As for that mangey duck, I gotta nice big juicy owange to shove up his b-b-b-b-beak!

BugSis? ~Yeah, if you like, as long as it snot BagSis!

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 22:31 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

OH BUM! His ears got chopped off.

See if this works..

(\bs/)

(='.'=)

(')_(')

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 22:33 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

YAY!!!!!

: ¬ D

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 22:34 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Artistic Bag sis sorry Bug sis.oops Big Sis.(Running off before sis could take aim)

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 22:49 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I prefer the simple things in life - like

B(.)(.)BS

Much easier.

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 23:5 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Well can we start the shooting season just now?Please Please pretty please.Grrr....lol

Posted on 24 October 2008 @ 23:9 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Oi... Bugs!!! You're not goofy by any chance are you? LoL!!

Oh no, goofy was a dog...hahahaha!

Phillip, you're obsessed with boobs, be'ave yerself you randy ol' git!!

Posted on 25 October 2008 @ 0:9 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

But Sis - they're all warm and soft and squidgy and make fabulous dummies, pillows and playthings. Simple pleasures are usually the cheapest and best!

Posted on 25 October 2008 @ 10:12 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Cheapest ? CHEAPEST???!!

Well, mine are dear...very dear....to me! Both of them!

Posted on 25 October 2008 @ 13:20 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Uncy! they r cheap huh?try touching one at work.you will end up realizing how cheap they really are.Doesn't aunt read your posts?A month's ban from her bedroom would definitely do you good.QT.

Posted on 25 October 2008 @ 14:25 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Well Bugs, her bedroom is also my bedroom! No, b(.)(.)bs aren't cheap, but the pleasure is! I bet you can't guess what I get for breakfast some mornings?

Posted on 25 October 2008 @ 16:2 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Ewww! I don't want to know.scampering away.Where is Big Sis by the way?she is the only one to keep you at bay.

Posted on 25 October 2008 @ 16:34 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

I'll keep him a bay alright Bugs, he shouldn't be too hard to handle....pardon the pun....HA!!

You see my dear little bunnykins with the buck teeth and fluffy tail, yer uncle Phillip, right, ... he has this obsession with women's 'boulders'. (Our bras are now referred to as....

'over the shoulder boulder holders'.

He saw a photo of me once, fully clothed - I might add, and ever since then he's never let it drop...another unintentional pun!

Posted on 26 October 2008 @ 0:0 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Big Sis you just might make it on Santa's list.Who knows Uncle Phil might end up getting only a 'over the shoulder boulder holders'. :-))

Posted on 26 October 2008 @ 5:10 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

... or 'Upper Decker Flopper Stoppers'

Posted on 27 October 2008 @ 18:1 (London time) - permalink
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birdynumnums, posted over a year ago

Or the German brassiere, the "Shtoppem from Floppen",

Or the Western Bra, the "Round'em Up and Head'em Out"!

Hope this isn't Double-D'ed or going Tit's Up... LOL!

Posted on 27 October 2008 @ 19:0 (London time) - permalink
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BigSis, posted over a year ago

Birdy, you always save the breast 'til last, don'tcha?

xXx

Posted on 28 October 2008 @ 1:9 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

A few good Signs:

In a cocktail lounge, Norway:

LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR."

In a doctor's office, Rome:

SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

In a dry cleaners, Bangkok:

"DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS"

In a Nairobirestaurant:

"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER."

On At Riverhighway: this is the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi.

TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE."

On a poster at Kencom:

"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP."

In a City restaurant in India:

"OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS."

A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer in Karachi, Pakistan:

"DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS."

In a cemetery in Beijing, China:

"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES."

A Tokyohotel's rules and regulations:

"GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIORS IN BED"

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:

"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."

In a Tokyobar:

"SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS."

In a hotel, Yugoslavia:

"THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID"

In a hotel, Japan:

"YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID."

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:

"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY."

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:

"IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER

IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE."

In a hotel, Zurich:

"BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE."

An advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:

"WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"

On the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:

"GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE."

In a Swiss mountain inn:

"SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE CREAM."

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:

"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."

A laundry in Rome:

"LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME."

Posted on 17 November 2008 @ 22:49 (London time) - permalink
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