A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Right ok this may sound confusing but really it is quite simple. Basically this last that aprently used to like me n i liked him, we had some awkwardnes last eyar between us. But we sorted it all out n we've been like the best of friends for these past 2- 3 months. Honestly some of the times it been amazing. There was one time when he seemed off with me and something was said which made me wonder if he hated me and we ha a talk and he made me see he didn't hate me and he told me he loved me as a m8, and that we were gonna start again be very good m8s and he wouldn't let me down. Up until this week that promised seemed to have been keptRight thing is this girl in our class had known me since i was 6, shes always had abit f a rpoblem with me just from generally knowing me a long time and possibly getting sick of me, she turned everyone aginst me last year for some unknown reason, well we're all pretty sure from whats happened that it was because this lad liked me and she got very jealous. Shes loved him from first meeting him and its very clear to people she doesn't like me and him being friends at all...I've been told by some friedns wat shes said about me, like she met up with this lad in the holidays and said to him that he's to go for her, not me. When i got told this i wa slike what the hell he won't go for me anyway. Which makes me and some others think that he's told her he still likes me. Because something must have made her do that! Also me go to these gigs together...she knows about it but isn't too happy. Also me and him went to a party last week and yea he was drunk but he was talking to my best m8 and was aying how this girl will never grow up, and he also just randomly said. "(my name)'s nice, but it'll never happen, you know.." just the way that was said kinda made me wonder if he still does like me. Anyway he was telling this girl and some others about this party and how ill he got afterwards and this girl just started bitching about me saying stuff to him like i bet she was trying stuff on wasnt she and he said no why would she, and then she kept going on and on about how horrible i was and stuff im supposed to have said and he was just agreeing like saying yea or yea i remember...to be honest i dont know if he really does agree or if its just to shut her up but hes said to be he takes it all in one ear and out the other.thing is she says a lot of stuff to people and they ont stand up to her..my tutor was involved last year becasue i got bullied with it all and it all got sorted but its just what shes been saying to him, maybe because he just takes it all in one ear n out the other but it is affecting us because he just wont talk to me like he did before. I noticed it alot when this girl was in the car last night he wouldn;t talk at all and then when she got out and i asked him about something he did abit more but not a lot. Thign is my m8s trying to talk to him and everytime the subject of what shes doing and the fact shes told people before she hates me gets brought up he wont say anything..Hes not a type of lad to bitch about anyone but surely if he thought it wasn't right when they all walk off and leave me then he could say somehting like wait for her? i dont know what to do because he does know whats going on because it seems to be to do with me and him. i have often wondered if he does get sick of me hanging round wiv him and the lads a lot at college but seriously...hes letting her win and we just need to get the message through to him. Him and this girl have been friends for years and he knows what shes like..he isn;t helping by the fact hes sticking with her and talking to her more and stopping talking to me as if theres something wrong. He just doesn;t seem to want to talk about it but it needs sorting what can we say to him...?? please help any questiosn you have i will answer them because i bet that is abit confusing. Basically shes jealous and shes winning people over espeically him!
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female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (4 February 2009):
ok, i'm glad you simplified the story at the end coz it was very complicated! first of all dont let yourself be angry at her because she is jealous, we all get jealous sometimes.secondly, as much as she seems to be making a war of this dont let yourself stoop down to her level (i know its hard to ignore her and go with other friends but this would be the best option, leave the situation for a while.) if this boy isnt communicating with you then you could write him a letter, (dont spill everything onto the letter though coz you never know who could see it)...could you let me know if this helps you, if you need more advice then could you ask your queston and just give the small amount of background info that i would need. xx
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