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My brother's girlfriend is out to get me!

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 June 2013) 1 Answers - (Newest, 15 June 2013)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Dear cupid, iv got a huge problem with my brothers new girlfriend and i dont no what to do. the bottom line is that she hates me all because of a misunderstanding that she wont forgive me f or. My brother is 21 and she is 39, and has 3 kids, one who is nearly as old as him. To be honest it came as a shock to me. I dont have anything against age gaps but i was worried about why a woman would want to be with somebody the same age as her own kid and didnt want my brother to be hurt so i advised him not to get too serious/involved and to be careful because she has 3 different fathers for her children and i was genuinly worried that he might get into trouble, this is his first relationship. The silly boy told her and she was strait on the phone to me, screaming like a banshee about how I was a pathetic nosy cow who should mind my own buisness and if i dont she says she is going to phone social services and have my child taken from me!!! Now this was really extreme and uncalled for. Im not worried about having my baby taken because I know my husband and I are good parents. The problem I have is Now i just dont want to be around her but she walks past my house and stares in, and also on occasion visits at my parents house, strangely when I am there! She makes snide remarks about my weight, and general apearance and told me that my baby was scruffily dressed and how I should be careful. My mother picked up on this and asked her what she meant by it and I told her she has been treatening me with social services because of the advice I gave my brother. I told her that I was sorry and I no longer want to argue and she turned around and stormed off telling me and my mother to get stuffed. Now my brother wont talk to either of us, my mum is crying because of it and I feel really awful and just dont know how to fix it!!!!

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A female reader, Dear Mandy United Kingdom +, writes (15 June 2013):

Dear Mandy agony auntHI

You have nothing to fix . This woman sounds like a devious woman, and if she is your brothers first real girlfriend he is going to probably be obsessed with her rather than in love. The best thing you can do is rise above it and let your brother see for himself what she is like. Speak to your mum because you need each other right now, and try to get your brother on his own if you can, explain to him that if he don't want to speak with you then that's his choice, but to ignore his mother over a woman is very wrong. He has only ONE mother in life and if he ruins that now one day he will never forgive himself. You WONT stop him from making his own mistakes, all you can do is be there to pick up the pieces when it all comes crashing down, and trust me it will by the sounds of this horrid woman. I know how difficult this is for you ( I have been going through something VERY similar ! ) but you just have to ride this one out, eventually she will start showing her true colours to him and he will drop her like a hot rock.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Mandy x

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