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I'm not happy with his past and thinking of leaving

Tagged as: Age differences, Breaking up, Dating, Family, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 May 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 29 May 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, *arah10 writes:

Do i stay with my boyfriend or leave.

my partner is 43 and im 24 and we have just had our first baby together. he has been married before and has 2 children with his ex wife and he also has another child with another women. This women keeps coming round my house and writing my partner rude letters.i contacted her and asked her to stop writing the letters and leave us alone. She never mentions there child together only tells me she loves him. i cant get this women of my mind and im thinking of leaving. im not happy with his past.

View related questions: ex-wife, his ex

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A female reader, K09 United Kingdom +, writes (29 May 2009):

Hello,

As stressful as this situation is you really can not do much other than to talk to your boyfriend about how much his ex-girlfriend's behaviour upsets you.

Ideally, he should tell his ex not to come around to your home or to have inappropriate contact with him.

To leave him based on this alone is not a wise thing to do, especially if you have a child with him.

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A female reader, ilovebowsandcherries United Kingdom +, writes (29 May 2009):

ilovebowsandcherries agony aunthun this isn't up to you this is down to him.

don't leave him because of this.

you need to tell him or get him to get a restraining order or something.

because i mean she can't keep doing this to you both when you've got a child now as well it's unfair.

he needs to get this sorted.

talk to him and tell him he needs to get it sorted now.

hope this helps.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2009):

There could be at least two ways of getting her off his and your backs. 1. He could tell her to stop her behaviour and hope that she listens. 2. He could take out a court injunction against her to keep her away from your house. He's the one that needs to do these things, not you.

You also need to tell him what this situation is doing to you and that you're thinking of leaving him because of it, which might spur him into doing something about it.

I assume he's making maintenance payments for all his offspring? If not, it would be difficult for him to take the moral high ground.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2009):

If you weren't happy with his past, that's somethign you should've thought about a long time ago. You've already committed to him an dbrought another child into the picture. It would be very immature to leave him because of his ex wife.

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