A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and I have gotten to the point where we are starting to be sexually active with each other. We are both very attracted to each other, but she made me wait for a while but that is okay because she is worth it. Our first two nights together have been wonderful but not without some concern. On the positive side, even though I am less experienced than her she said I did very well and she did not have to fake anything. She asked for repeats during the night so I guess I was doing something right. On the negative side, I did hurt myself with some joint dislocations several times each night. The deal is I have a medical condition called Ehlers Danlos which can cause joints to dislocate easily and causes joint pain even though I am just 30. I have had this my whole life and I am able to re-locate my own joints when they go out of place. She knew I had this condition before we had sex and she has even watched me deal with some minor dislocations before. I do a special low weight but high repetition workout that strengthens the muscles around my joints and has actually reduced how often I have dislocations.During sex with her I dislocated my shoulders multiple times each time. I tried to hide how much it hurt but she could see it in my face and I cannot help groaning when it happens and I sort of shouted the F word each time. We would stop and I would re-locate the joint or joints and I stayed fully ready and we continued almost immediately. I felt like I was hit by a truck the next day because of extreme muscle soreness the next morning but it was worth it. I asked her if it turned her off and said I was her “hero” to keep going like that and made a joke about dislocating my penis.I thought we were good but now when I mention sex she seems less eager. She said she had fun and wants more but is worried sex is going to be like torture for me causing dislocations. We talked about other positions we could try that put less stress on my shoulders. We talked about going slower and less forceful movements even when we feel like going faster or getting more intense. That will take a lot of will power. She said she feels guilty having pleasure when I have to suffer joint dislocations and feel so sore the next day. I am okay with the trade off but now I am worried her guilt will shut down our new sex life. How can I make her understand it is okay and I can handle it?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2022): Girl on top AKA Cowgirl is a lot of fun for both and no stress on the guy down below. Give it a try.
I was injured during with my wife. My chick urologist said her jackhammering pelvis caused the the injury. She said don't tell her she caused it, and I won't tell my husband -- he'll be so jealous. (old school doc, no filters, tells dirty jokes)
If it happens again we'll fix you again. That's what she said.
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (27 August 2022):
You may think that you can continue like this, but I'm sure that what time it'll be too much to bear. You should probably get used to learning how to deal with it. For instance, let her get on top of you. If you really want some speed, there are ways to enjoy sex without jackhammering your woman.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 August 2022):
 Aww OP!
You are trying too hard here. I get that due to your genetic condition can easily dislocate joints (which sucks) you NEED to find positions that work for BOTH of you so you don't end up with swollen joints or constant pain.
I dislocated my shoulder in winter (I was flapping my arms trying to not fall on my ass on some ice and ended up popping my shoulder out of the socket and back in. I was SORE and in pain for a good 4 months) And I don't HAVE a condition like you, but it's NOT good for joints to be dislocated too often, FOR anyone. Including you.
So PLEASE find positions where you BOTH get pleasure and no dislocated joints, OK?
Or you will ruin HER libido and your joints. That is a lose/lose situation.
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