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How can I make myself so mom won't be nasty to me?

Tagged as: Family, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 July 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 31 July 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

my mum is always nasty to me and just picks on me for nothing. she has just come home and i am sat on my laptop and just asked her how was work? and she said as if you care! now get upstairs! i dont understand why she is like this. i do well at school my room is tidy i clean the house. i'm 16 i have a job i go college its not as if i'm a lazy person! she calls me fat even tho i am 5ft 2in and weight 102 pounds! and she is larger than size 20 and i'm a size 6! she just starts arguments and knows my dad is going to side with her! i cant move out until i am 18 and i've got months left! how can i make myself so she wont be nasty to me?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2010):

What your mom is saying has nothing to do with you. She is severely stressed out and takes her anger out on you. When she comes home from work and you ask her how her day was, she is going to explode. Most likely she has her problems with work. Maybe she hates her job and is stressed about bills. She loves you but has so much on her plate that she is throwing her frustration on you. Your dad sides with her because he most likely does not want to deal with your mother's tantrums. You can clean and cook all you want but your mother isn't going to care. But trust me, keep up with the cleaning because she is just going to complain about the housework. And you aren't fat but she hates her body and is again, taking it out on you. You said your mother is large and she knows that. Just know that you did nothing wrong and try to be the best daughter you can be. You should try and talk to your mom. Tell her that you feel hurt when she attacks you and that you know she's stressed. Tell her that no matter what she does, you'll always love her and be there for her. Ask her how you can help and hopefully she'll see all the love and realize what an angery person she has been acting like. Maybe you could talk to your dad as well and give your mom a good heart to heart with his inputs as well. And no matter what happens, God will never abandon you and know that he is always listening. I like to pray at night and tell him about some of the hardships I'm going through and I just feel the weight dropping from my shoulders. Be strong and just know that you did nothing wrong!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

yes she has always been like this. i have asked my sisters and they say she was like this but not as bad as what she is with me

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2010):

Like DocGrl83 said has she always been like this or just started? Have you got an Aunt or Grandmother you could talk to and maybe get them to have a word with her.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2010):

Has she always been like this or has this just started to happen recently? There could be a million reasons why she is like this- maybe set aside some time with her and ask her how her day was and just listen to what she has to say. Don't talk or say anything until she is finished talking. She sounds stressed out. Try to be extra helpful with chores and ask if she needs anything. If it keeps up and she stays this way, start saving up money until you are 18 and can get out there on your own. Take care!

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