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He says that relationships never work out... how do I convince him otherwise!?

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Question - (31 December 2006) 3 Answers - (Newest, 9 February 2007)
A female age 30-35, *ooimeisie12 writes:

So I like this guy and he is the same age as me and he likes me too. But the problem is he doesn't want to go out because he believes that relationships never work out and that we will probably end up hating each other. I want to convince him that it's not that bad but I don't know what to say. What should I do?

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A female reader, mooimeisie12 +, writes (9 February 2007):

mooimeisie12 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Well this is an update. We have been going out for the past 3 weeks and everything is going great except for the fact that we are always arguing over stupid things and i think that we have a lot to clear up and well i guess im happy. But yea, He said that He is far away from love and i understand that and accept that. But i think i may be falling in love with him but i dont want to say anything because i know that he will probably be freaked out by it. What do i do?

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A female reader, willywombat United Kingdom +, writes (1 January 2007):

willywombat agony auntYou are both very young to be thinking of a relationship. But that said, in answer to your question you can't change somebodys mind. Chances are if you try you will kill your friendship! I suggest going along and enjoying the friendship, he doesn't sound as if he is READY to have a one on one relationship with you yet. I mean emotionally mature enough. Girls do mature faster than boys as a rule remember.

xx

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A female reader, AngelofLove United Kingdom +, writes (1 January 2007):

AngelofLove agony auntHe is very young to be so negative about relationships. Perhaps he has been hurt in the past or the example at home is not a positive one.

Either way take it slow with him, there is plenty of time to get to know each other as friends first and reassure him that his experience does not represent all relationships. Luckly for most of us, some of them do actually work, there can be love, trust, respect and fun without hating each other.

xxx

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