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Boyfriend spends no time with me!

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 December 2013) 8 Answers - (Newest, 31 December 2013)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hi there iv bin seeing this boy for bout 3wks know and he has said we are girlfriend n boyfriend but every time I ask him to spend time with me he says yes then when it come to it he doesn't answer any off my phone calls or text! He said he needs time and space to get use to having a gf again as it's bin so long for him, he said that he will put move effort in texting and calling move but doesn't iv ask him and he just says he will,

He would rather spend time with he's m8s instead off me! He doesn't have money at the mo but I have said I would pay but he just seems to fine any thing to not spend time with me and I think is there another girl what should I do please help!!

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (31 December 2013):

So_Very_Confused agony auntwalk away... stop calling him.

when he calls you and wants money or sex just say NO

it's a NON-relationship.

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A female reader, Ciar Canada +, writes (30 December 2013):

Ciar agony auntWalk away from this. No announcements. No texts. No emails or phone calls. Just walk away.

He clearly isn't interested and bribing him to stick around would be a big mistake.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2013):

You've got a loser on your hands. Keep your money in your purse where it belongs. He will only see you as a needy woman he can use.

Dump him!!! Is there an echo in here?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2013):

"Dump" him. I say it like that because you're not boyfriend and girlfriend. You don't become that just because he said so OP, being partners is not just words it's actions and 3 weeks of supposedly being with this guy his actions say he's not bothered with you at all.

Time to walk away.

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A female reader, Lieutenant United Kingdom +, writes (30 December 2013):

It's only been 3 weeks; if he was really into you as he should be, he wouldn't be able to wait for every date that you set up; he would be excited to receive calls and texts from you. He's just not that into you; time to keep steppin' (i.e. move on).

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A male reader, Darrell Goodliffe United Kingdom +, writes (30 December 2013):

Darrell Goodliffe agony auntWell something isnt right here. I can understand what he was saying leading to him spending less time with you than would otherwise be normal, I could understand his lack of money being a concern and again possibly leading to less time with you but what I cant understand is all this to spending no time with you.

It may not be the case that is another girl but he's certainly not 100% bothered about this relationship as he is putting zero sum effort in. I think you can either confront him about it or return his lack of effort, dont contact him, don't chase him at all and see what happens, if he gets in touch then he is at least some way interested, if he doesnt he isnt at all and id suggest ditching him and finding someone who will make the time and effort to be with you.

Good luck.

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia +, writes (30 December 2013):

Aunty BimBim agony auntSounds like it might be three weeks too many. Don't text, do dump him and yell NEXT!

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (30 December 2013):

Dump him. You've only been seeing him for 3 weeks, and let's face it, there's not much actual 'seeing'. I'd dump him and move on asap.

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