A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:theres a guy i like and would love it if he asked me out but i need to get his attention first. we are friends he said he liked me before but didnt do anything about it we do fun friend flirting that doesnt mean anything asfar as i know ,im too chicken to make the first move and im wondering if i said i was going on a date it would make him feel slightly jealous and make him think more about me and see that if he was interested then he could be losing me to someone else ( i wouldnt be going on an actual date bit of a naughty fib i woud be out with a couple of friends instead ) i just dont know what i can do im useless at flirty and getting dates is this a silly idea and if so what else could i do ?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (19 November 2014):
 Lying to a person to try and make them interested or jealous will without doubt backfire, it's NOT cute to "naughty lie" - a lie is a lie.
Instead why not ASK if he wants to join your friend and yourself on that outing? That is not asking him on a date but to doing something together socially. You call him a friend... so ask him out JUST like he was one of your other friends.
So, in short don't be daft.
A
male
reader, MrBigShot110 +, writes (19 November 2014):
Don't do that. A lot of guys will think you're playing with them and aren't interested. If you like this guy, you wouldn't put him through that. Just be forward, or if you don't want to do that just see if he makes a move. Don't be afraid to show a little interest to get him going. It won't make you seem desperate.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (19 November 2014):
 Wo all that trouble and just ask the poor guy out? He's probably just shy and you trying to trick him will just nail the door shut.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (19 November 2014):
 how about if you ask him to join you and your friends for this event...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2014): No to be honest if I liked a girl and she said she was going on a date it wouldn't say to me MAN NOW I've got to go and express my feelings!! I'd be like fair enough she doesn't like me time to move on.
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A
male
reader, lifesgreat +, writes (19 November 2014):
Yeah don't lie! as Celtic said it might backfire also making somebody a tad jealous ( even if it is a lie ) isn't going to be great .
Just go for it .. I knew a friend who I got on with well and liked and to this day still regret not actually asking her out .
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A
female
reader, Fari +, writes (19 November 2014):
 I think you need to be bold and ask him out. I know as women we are used to men doing the lot but it can both ways. I don't think you should create a fake date to make him jealous as that is pretty much what it will do and in the process make him lose whatever feelings that he may have for you.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (19 November 2014):
Yes do that...Because I am sure if the guy you like came up and told you the same thing, you would be so happy to hear that. Point is...If you wouldn't like it, don't do it to someone else.
You are a woman, and women have certain qualities men just go nuts for. Use your womanly charms to get his attention, not lies.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2014): Come on, you're in your 20's if you like him just ask him out for coffee or something. There's no point playing childish games, if you get found out you'll just look daft. Just go for it and ask him out!
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A
male
reader, SensitiveBloke +, writes (19 November 2014):
 You don't want to start a relationship with a lie. Relationships must be built on trust.
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (19 November 2014):
 You are a grown up. Playing games is for teenagers, and lies will always come out in the end.
If you like this guy, take the bull by the horns and ask him out.
How do you know that he isn't also shy and scared of rejection too? Why is it ok for a man to take the risk of rejection and not the woman?
If he is shy, and you tell him "I'm going out with someone else", he might just assume that you only like him as a friend and move on too. Fibs always backfire.
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