A
female
age
16-17,
*addierose
writes:Hi everyone, For a couple of years I have been flirting on and of with a guy a few years older than me and it's hardly ever led to something. But he came to a house party at mine on Friday night and things got a bit out of hand and we ended up kissing and we very almost had sex however we didn't. The thing is I wouldn't want a relationship with this guy - he is a complete arse! But there is a lot of sexual tension between us and we are definitely sexually attracted to each other so would it be completely wrong of me to have only a sexual relationship with him? At first I ruled this out because all my friends said he would be using me. But then I figured that I would kind of being using him as well so it wouldn't be a problem. He clearly isn't a relationship kind of guy, nobody really ever 'has' him.What do you guys think?Thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, maddierose +, writes (5 August 2009):
maddierose is verified as being by the original poster of the question Honestly, just as a random little late feedback. Who ever said no strings attached hate sex was a bad thing, is a weirdo. It's out of my system and we're still fine with eachother even though as a person he drives me up the wall but in the sexual department, I honestly don't care. And we know that if were feel like it we can have sex and not be emotionally effected.
Happy endings all round folks :-)
A
male
reader, Danielepew  + ♥, writes (8 March 2009):
 I agree with Uncle Phil. I can only add that, if he's circumcised, he won't even have his foreskin for drawback :-).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2009): My philosophy: If it feels good, do it.
However, there are certain drawbacks to the kind of arrangement where the two of you meet up occasionally purely for sex. The only drawback as far as he's concerned will be his foreskin. Your drawback will be that you'll probably get all emotional, jealous and possessive if you find out he's doing the same thing with some other female, which is quite likely. You see, men can spread themselves rather thinly and not get attached whereas women tend to start to fall in love with any man they have sex with, which causes all sorts of problems and screaming matches.
If you can remain emotionally detached then I'd say go for it and enjoy it while it lasts, which probably won't be all that long.
I won't rattle on about STD's because I'm sure you're old and wise enough to understand the risks that you could expose yourself to - except for just one word: Condom.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (8 March 2009):
 Go for it, have sex with him, just do it safely, if you don't want a relationship with him, you really don't want him to be the father of your children.
Once that's out of your system you can either go for a FWB relationship or just leave it as a one night stand.
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A
female
reader, Olivia(Y). +, writes (8 March 2009):
 It wouldn't be wrong as if you both know it would just be sex.
Take in mind though you could get pregnant. As you have said hes not a relationship person, does he sleep around?
If he does just make sure he doesn't have an STI.
Use a condom and mabey go on the pill and you should be safe.
Good luck
Livia
x
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A
male
reader, FroggieGman  +, writes (8 March 2009):
You and he can be what we call in the USA "Fuck Buddies." No emotional attachments, just hot steamy sex every once and awhile.
Good Luck
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