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Would I be standing up for my girlfriend or causing more trouble?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Long distance, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 July 2010) 0 Answers - (Newest, )
A male Australia age 30-35, *hostChild writes:

My girlfriend and I are in a long distance relationship, we're about 700 kms away from each other, but we still got to see each other semi regularly.

She's told me a lot about her ex-boyfriends, how they're both highly self absorbed, use women and are pretty much dicks.

At first I thought that she might be exaggerating since everyone seems to be bitter about their exes, but then I met her ex-boyfriend once. He was a arrogant, self indulgent, full of himself tool. He wasn't directly mean to me or her when we bumped into him, but he was just horrible to spend any amount of time with.

Recently, my girlfriend got into a massive fight with her ex-boyfriend and his current girlfriend. He's really immature, started going on and on to her about how he was a better boyfriend than I am, made fun of the fact that we're in a long distance relationship, and insulted me stating that I'm dumb, unfit and lack personality in so many words.

My girlfriend stood up for me, and has now stopped talking to them, but now she wants me to message him over Facebook or Myspace or email him having a go at him about it. She's really adamant that I do, and I was really annoyed to hear about what he had said, but this all happened yesterday, and he was insulting me, not her. My girlfriend's been on my case about standing up for her more often, which I should do, but he wasn't really being mean to her, he was belittling me.

I'm more of the kind of guy who doesn't let things like this get to him and start fights about it, and I feel that sending him a message/email and confronting him might be throwing fuel on the fire since it seems to be winding down and they're both getting over it already.

I know this is mostly a pretty minor problem but I'm just conflicted. If I were there in person, present while it was being said then I would said something, but I wasn't, and now the moment's past.

Would it be wise to confront her ex now about it? He's not the apologetic understanding type, he's the immature, selfish, manipulative type who will more than likely start more trouble from it.

View related questions: facebook, her ex, immature, long distance, myspace

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