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Would a man, given the opportunity, cheat if he thought he could get away with it?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Cheating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (14 April 2011) 11 Answers - (Newest, 16 April 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Question for married men. Why do men cheat and want to talk online to other women when they say they are happily married? Would they really cheat or even flirt if they were that happy? Would a man given the opportunity actually cheat if he could get away with it?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2011):

I too think communication is paramount in a preventive measure against cheating. If your guy is about to tap some fluff on the side, the communication should come immediately, and be in the form of a divorce petition served taped to a base ball bat.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2011):

I won't, and I've had plenty of opportunity with younger and attractive women.

Why?

Because I truly love my wife, and I don't believe in cheating, and no matter how great the temptation nothing is worth hurting her over.

Am I alone in the world? No, there are plenty more like me, but we are invisible relative to those who cheat.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2011):

99% people whether male or female will cheat if they know there is no/slim chance of getting caught.

LoveGirl

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2011):

I don't think all men would, if they were happy in their relationship getting both emotional and sexual fulfillment and they loved and respected the person they were with, then no, and that goes for both sexes

On the other hand if all the above was not evident in the relationship well yes they would.

It really is as simple as that.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2011):

Its eaisier to cheat nowadays but it's not just the men it's just as many women I reckon. Women have alot more opportunity nowadays and the ones I have known to cheat are the ones you would least expect - none of them wanted to break up their marriage it was just fun to them

My 2 marraiges broke up cos they cheated and when I found out it was over. I obviously blamed myself, it had to be my fault. I have learned not to beat myself up anymore but have no trust left and remain single.

No doubt there are loyal people out there, same as some people drink and others don't

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2011):

Well yes I would! If you can get away with it, why wouldn't you? Do you know the old saying "what she doesn't know won't hurt her"? yeah well it's true!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2011):

Why go out shopping when everythings in at home?

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (14 April 2011):

dirtball agony auntIt all depends on the individual. Some men are horrible untrustworthy liars. Others are thoughtful loyal and honest.

Why may he flirt? To see if he still has it, or maybe get that ego boost. Lots of people in healthy and happy relationships flirt a little with others, but that doesn't mean they want to cheat. To some, it's simply a way to be friendly. It all depends on how far they take it because there are definitely boundaries that shouldn't be crossed.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2011):

well, i have been with my bf for 3 years, and i never cheated, not once. but i was cheated on so many times. i was still with him. until last week i couldnt trust him at all. it kills me. when i was reading all this messages he used to send to some women, he was not even using his real name. he was lying about himself. i have love him so much yet he still couldnt see. he had to do that. he even got someone pregnant before he met me, she had an abortion. he didnt even knew who he really was, it was not even his real name, she didnt know where he lives, and who he was. i couldnt believe things like this exist. i think some men are really horrible. he was cheating on me. when i think everything i did for him, i would give him bath when he was in hospital, look after him like a baby when he was sick. feed him. cook. wash. everything. he is twice my age. he had someone young, i was a virgin when i met him. i did all i could to keep him near me but he couldnt stop himself from cheating. he once cried and said he will stop, he never did. i cried and said he love me like crazy. i left him, it didnt do anything to him, his life was going on normal, i am still sufefring. he might have someone else to lie to may be. well. am glad am out of that. but i love him, i long for his touch so much.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (14 April 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony auntsome would

some would not

it's not a gender thing it's a personality thing.

I think that my first husband would not

the second and third would

the current boyfriend would not.

that's 50%... go figure

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A male reader, Illithid United States +, writes (14 April 2011):

Illithid agony auntWould a man cheat if he had the opportunity? Some would, some wouldn't. In some situations, a man would while in other situations, the same man wouldn't. I could ask the same about women: Would a woman cheat if she thought she could get away with it? There's no universally true answer to that. I'd say that cheating often stems from something wrong in the relationship though, either an unfulfilled need or unspoken distance. Talk to him more.

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