A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:Hiim 20 and ive fallen for a friend (24) who broke up with his gf (partly because it wasnt working and partly because he wanted to be with me). last week he kept asking me to go over his where we would just talk and watch films and just be together (we never slept together as didnt want to rush things). however things have been a bit awkward with his ex the last couple of days and i asked him last night what he really wants and whether he wanted to get back with her and he said ..."i honestly dont know what i want. sorry if this is confusing you but its the truth. maybe i just need some real time to think about it properly"i didnt answer him because i didnt know what to say so he then said ..."i care about you alot and dont want you to think otherwise. i just need some head space to work out what is best and fair. right now my head is just overloaded with feelings and confusion. i just hope you can be a little more patient".so i said .." im sorry if ive been impatient. i never meant to pressure you into doing anything before you were sure or ready but i guess thats what ive done. i'll give you whatever space and time you need, i just want you to be happy"did i do the right thing? its breaking my heart at the thought that he is considering going back to her. and i only went round his after i asked him if he was ready or wanted to wait abit but he said no he wanted me over so i believed him otherwise why would he have asked me. and then he says i need to be more patient. what should i do? i cant bare this much longer.
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male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (4 February 2008):
 HI,
you have done the right thing. But keep your distance from him until he resolves all his personal issues. You are not there to be an emotional pillow for all his relationship issues, so let him sort his feelings out for his ex by himself this will allow him to get his priorities straight.
But also, do not put yourself on the shelf waiting for him to come round, plenty of people take months even years to get over past loves. He is at least being honest with you, but in doing this you know that he is not over his ex.
Leave him be, by spending a lot of time with him you will only make him more confused.
Good luck.
A
male
reader, smootnezz  +, writes (4 February 2008):
hey,you did the right thing by asking him. if u are really sure he broke-up with his ex just to be with u, then you really don't have to worry. besides, he has told you he needs sometime to clear things. for me,that's a sign that he really cares about u and does not want to hurt you. moreover u spent sometime alone with him and he did not ask for sex. i think he cares about you. just give him sometime. some guys don't easily get over break-ups especially when they are the ones who initiated it. i am one of such guys. it is most likely that he is just felling remorseful after breaking-up with the other girl and not necessarilly thinking about going back to her. you need to be a little bit patient and careful. i can see you are about to experience true love from a guy who is real. GOOD LUCK.
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