A
male
age
36-40,
*lue_warrior
writes:I just want to find out if delayed ejaculation is necessarily than premature ejaculation where the female perspective is concerned. I sleep on a regular basis with sex workers. Normally, I ejaculate within a minute or tow, sometimes even within seconds. Tonight however, I decided to take a second approach. I had masturbated a few hours prior to my session with the sex worker. Much to my pleasure, I lasted significantly longer this time around. However, throughout this session, my penis did not not become completely rigid (the point at which I usually ejaculate) and remained only semi-hard. The sex worker became frustrated when I didn't ejaculate quickly and finally finished me off. I guess the question that I want to ask, is whether the ladies prefer a semi-erect penis that has staying power or a rock hard one that ejaculates within seconds. Thanks for reading this.
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ejaculate, ejaculation, my penis Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2014): Your sexual function in the context of an emotionless business transaction is not a good context on which to judge how it'll be during dating.
It's a very different experience when dating a normal woman because it's about mutual pleasure. You really won't have to worry too much because frankly sex is about more than just penetration and besides an erection is far easier to maintain for longer periods when there are real emotions involved and it's mutual.
It sounds like you've gotten your sexual priorities wrong in that sense, by having sex in a non-romantic setting. Motion, depth, angle and hitting the right spots in that specific woman are more important than lasting time, seeing as depending on the woman and even on her mood she may need longer and softer, fast and hard or long and hard etc. It's about how well you use what you have, not how long you can go for. Plus a nice trick is to get them off during foreplay first, that way they're satisfied before you even penetrate them.
OP the only way you'll hone your technique is with a regular woman through dating, and women don't expect men to be animals in bed straight away. Some do of course but most are very patient and you'd be surprised how a great personality, a willingness to give lots of head and strong emotions will make them even more patient.
A
male
reader, blue_warrior +, writes (3 March 2014):
blue_warrior is verified as being by the original poster of the questioncitadel, yes, that is exactly my predicament. It's either hard and fast for me or long and semi-soft. I'm currently on Prozac which might perhaps explain why I keep swinging between the two extremes. As for everyone else who answered, thanks for clarifying the situation. Yeah, when you put it that way, I guess an extended sex session isn't something a sex worker would look forward to. The thing is, how do I begin dating normal women when my sexual functioning always goes awry? Sigh..
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A
female
reader, citadel  +, writes (3 March 2014):
Such an interesting question. Are you saying you can do one or the other? Hard and quick or soft and long lasting?It's really up to you or maybe your control or your letting go of control. Guys who are into the practice of the ride are hard and last long. Guys who are into the end result are hard and fast. Guys who are soft and long are usually drunk. Ha.. or married or drugged up or have physical or mental shit going on, that they are not aware of.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (2 March 2014):
 Auntie TasteofIndia hit it spot on!
Most women PREFERS that BOTH of you are enjoying the sex. If you take forever and don't get her off, she will become sore and/or bored. Marathon sex works best if BOTH parties get off or get great pleasure from it.
Just like sex isn't about the SIZE of a penis, it's not about HOW long you can last. It's how well you do with what you got and how well you know your partner and HER/HIS likes/dislikes/kinks/whatnots.
OF COURSE a prostitute just wants you to get off and be done with it. You honestly think she is in that line of work because she just LOVE to have sex with random paying strangers?
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (2 March 2014):
 I think sex workers prefer you to finish as soon as possible.
What a woman who is in a relationship with a man wants in the bedroom depends completely on that particular woman and that particuar relationship.
But sex workers prefer the man to finish quickly. And they don't care if you are semi hard or not. They're not there to enjoy sex, they're there to make money.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2014): Ladies prefer you last longer but sex workers prefer if you ejaculate quickly. Don't mistake the two. Sex workers arr not women there hoping you'll pleasure them, it's business they want to seal the deal quickly so they can move on to another customer and make more money for the evening.
Don't even think or pretend that you want to pleasure a sex worker, that's simply not going to happen no matter what you do.
The politest, nicest way is to ejaculate quickly with no fuss and not make their job harder or more work.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (2 March 2014):
 Excellent, Taste!!
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (2 March 2014):
 Dude.
Okay, let me just process your question.
Okay.
You are asking about a SEX WORKER. She wants you to get off as quickly as possible so that she can be done with you and move along to the next John, or perhaps get back home to a nice cup of tea and a croissant. I don't think you should be judging how much your partner enjoys your sexual tactics when your partner is paid to tolerate you for a quick roll in the hay.
I think that for a sex worker, she's going to mostly enjoy it if you're rock hard and you finish in seconds. That way she can get back to the rest of her life. And for a woman who isn't a sex worker? Well, once you get a girlfriend (who accepts your past trysts with prostitutes), you can ask her what she prefers.
If you're semi-erect and take forever to finish with your next "lady of the evening", I'd suggest giving her a generous tip - and I'm not talking about your dick.
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A
female
reader, Pr3tty_in_pink86  +, writes (2 March 2014):
She is a sex worker they are doing it for money that's why she wanted you be quick.
For me full harness, my ex had ed etc. sex was long and boring, I didn't even feel like i'd had sex.
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