A
female
age
30-35,
*licia89
writes:Today my family had a halloween party. I was having fun until i started to notice that my cousins and their kids got along so well. I started to feel jealous of how they all were talking and hanging out and their i was just sitting down. I tried talking to them but some how i felt ignored or was it that i havent talk to them in a while that i was feeling that way?? Whatever it was got me thinking. Im the only child so my son doesnt have aunts, uncles, or cousins close to him because my husbands side doesnt live close to us. So basically we are on our own, well besides my parents. Just wished i had brothers or sisters so we could all hang out like them. I feel sorry for my son because he's not going to have aunt's and uncle's close to him. I don't know what to think. Just want your advice.
View related questions:
cousin, jealous Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2011): I have a lot of family friends who do not have extended family, but you become their extended family, like my mums best friend has two daughters, their uncle was gay so they never had cousins, so my and my brother were there cousins, and it works just as well as real blood related family. As So Very Confused said, you choose your child's 'family', just integrate your friends and their children into your childs life as much as you can.
Even if you don't, your child won't miss out, yes he would be missing out on what a lot of children have, but he won't know any different, which is sad, but it's that way for a lot of families.
A
female
reader, alicia89 +, writes (1 November 2011):
alicia89 is verified as being by the original poster of the question All of yaul had very good answers i really appreciate it.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (1 November 2011):
 That was my kids... no cousins on my side and all their cousins on their dad's side out of the country. they survived nicely...
cultivate friends with kids and make them the CHOOSEN family.
...............................
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (1 November 2011):
 there is nothing you can do to change this matter so it is not worth getting upset about. lots of families have many members but that does not always mean that they will be close or even like each other! people who come from big families are not always necessarily the happiest, in a smaller family the child often gets more love and attention than someone who has to share it with many relatives. give your child the confidence to go out and make friends of his own, people that he chooses to hang out with, not just those who are in his life just because genes put them there
x
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 November 2011):
 No worries. My son is the only child of an only child ( his father ) , not only , he grew up in USA while our small family ( 3 grandparents and 1 aunt,my sister ) lived in Europe. He had a happy, fun childhood, filled with people and companionship.
Families are families of the heart. You chose and make your own families ,in a way , with the people you meet and feel affinity and closeness with. I have cousins that I don't see since when I was a child, and others that I see maybe once a year, and they are obviously much less " family " than my alternative families of friends and coworkers and companions in faith.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2011): I do have 4 brother's, but they are all between 14-19 years older than me, so I basically grew up like an only child. My cousins were the same ages as my brother's, and I am not particularly close to any of them, they tend to ignore me, or that is how it feels anyway. I grew up without the extended family, and to be honest I had a fantastic childhood and loved my life. I only had my parents and my Nan (as other grandparents had passed), and I was more than happy. Your kids won't be bothered by it, they will be happy with what they have. It is nice to have family around, but even whilst I was growing up I didn't really have much to do with my brother's, as they moved out as soon as they could and didn't come around much, so I don't really have any memories of them in my life as a child, now their children are mostly grown and I never see them either. your children will be fine because they have such a wonderful and loving Mum, and in the end that is what really matters. Don't worry about what if they had extended family, make the most out of what they do have, because your kids have the 2 most important things they need in life, you and your husband who love them more than life itself, that is what they want and what they need. I hope this helps, and good luck.
...............................
|
