A
female
age
30-35,
*baby12
writes:So I want to start off telling my story, starting 5 years ago. I met this man, and I instantly knew I was in love with him. crazy, but true. we started spending every day together, with friends, and by ourselves. time went on, and he started using drugs. After he was on drugs, he started stealing from everyone, his mom, family, and me. i knew it was wrong, and we have seperated several times for his issues. I am an empath,and i can sense how people feel, and I knew he loved me too. we went our seperate ways so many times, but we always end up back in eachothers lives. a few days ago, we met up, and he was obviously high. he told me he was sorry for everything hes done to me, and for breaking my heart. he ended up cuddling with me all night, and he had never been so sweet with his words, we clicked intensly. but he stole from me again. I know this question is stupid, but will be ever regret hurting me? he told me I was the only woman who loved him as much as I did. he has known i have always been in love with him, and i dont know what to do. I sound like an idiot, but this man has effected me so dramatically, I cant let it go
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2014): If he rehabilitates and cleans up his drug habit, of course he will regret it. In fact, apologizing and seeking forgiveness from all those that you hurt is part of the 12 step program. As long as he has this addiction, however, it is unlikely he will feel any regret. Not because he is a callous person but because addiction is all-consuming. His only priority, his love affair is with the drug. That is number one to him. Number two and number three as well. Drugs are very powerful and that's all he cares about. And he will lie, cheat, steal and hurt those he loves to get his fix. It's the sad reality of addiction. Drug addiction is a disease. You should educate yourself in how these people's brains work and the do's and dont's of dealing with an addict. If you truly love him, you should probably have an intervention and have him go to rehab. Cuddling with him, allowing him into your home is only enabling his addiction, as you see. He needs to be in rehab. You should work on getting him into a clinic right away.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (9 September 2014):
 Will he regret it.
Maybe... after he's in recovery and has worked his steps.
You won't know till he gets to the "make ammends to all I have harmed in the past" and contacts you to apologize and give himself and you closure in his journey towards wellness.
Right now he is sick. He has an addiction. Mental or physical it does not matter. He is an addict as as such his life is fueled and driven by his need/desire to get high.
YOU do not matter now. YOU will not matter till he is clean and sober long term.
I would not sit around and wait for that day.
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A
female
reader, ShakeWutUrMamaGaveYou  +, writes (8 September 2014):
Hi,
I'm sorry you're going through this.
He probably does love you, but as olderthandirt said, because drugs rule his life he needs them.
My older cousin does drugs, and he emotionally blackmails his mum to give him money, but I know he loves her.
People who do drugs can get highly adicted to it and they'll do anything for it.
For example:
Say if you were put somewhere with no food. No food at all. We need food because it is one of our needs, so say you've been in this place and you're sooooo hungry. You'd do anything for it, even if it means breaking the rules.
I think this is what it's like for people who do drugs. They're convinced that they NEED drugs. They think that they'll die without it.
Maybe you should talk to him about some help for stopping, as help is available.
Good luck! xxx!
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (8 September 2014):
 He probably is actually sorry for hurting you but drugs rule his life now not logic,ergo he's never goingo be the ame person you thought you had.Good Luck
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (8 September 2014):
 "....will be (he) ever regret hurting me?...."
No.... he doesn't understand "regret" and many other emotions that you would like to find in your man-partner. He is interested ONLY in his next drug fix.....
Save your sanity and dump him now.... and get on with your life.... Why waste YOUR life trying to save HIM?????
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (8 September 2014):
 No,I don't think he will regret it. Pardon me, but this guy sounds like a total sociopath ( and sociopaths do not feel regret ) - stealing from his mom ?.. This is something that even most addicts generally draw the line at.
I think he has his priority well clear in his mind- he, him and himself, and whatever promotes HIS interests and gratification, so he will tell anybody anything that serves his purposes. Or maybe, he may also realize he is doing wrong to people like you , who care about him, may he have some fleeting repentance and express it IN THE MOMENT, but obviously it's not enough to stick , as soon as it is expressed... it's gone and forgotten.
As for you being an empath and being able to feel his love... I guess that a lot depends from your definition of love, personally I fail to see what love has got to do with theft, I'd say that stealing from someone who loves you and trusts you is a rather UNLOVING action.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (8 September 2014):
 His main priority is getting high and getting money to get high. I know it hurt, but you were and mean to an end. As in, he could get money of you. (one way or another). Most addicts don't think past that.
You are still seeing him for who he was and that is what is going to cost you, emotionally, physically and financially if you don't cut him out.
I think you have to accept, that the guy you fell in love with is no more. He is gone, in his place is an addict with his face. THAT is how you are going to have to think.
Will he EVER regret? Who know? Maybe if he finds in himself to get clean he will look back, maybe he won't. No one can tell.
You will HAVE to let go at some point, unless you want to waste your own life too.
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