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Why won't she give me her number?

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Question - (17 June 2012) 10 Answers - (Newest, 18 June 2012)
A male United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I tried to get this girls number off of myyearbook.com, here's how the conversation went:

Me: You have really pretty hair :)

Her: Aha,thank youuu

Me: You're welcome :)

Her: :)

Me: Can I have your number?

Her: No

Me: Ok.

Why wouldn't she give me her number? On her profile description she says "If you want my number, just ask :)" I don't think I'm bad looking just average. In my profile pic I have long hair and a moustache. I'm 17. I'm just asking out of curiosity to see if I approached her wrong or what.....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for the help guys. Also, I'm really bad at finding things to talk about with girls. How can I keep them entertained and not bore them? What kind of questions do I ask them? Every time I talk to a girl in real life I always think to my self "Should I say this, or that? blah blah blah" or if it's over test I'll think "Should I put a smiley face after this, or is that too pushy?" Ugh it's like I'm trying too hard to just have a normal conversation. That's why I jump right to asking for their number.

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A female reader, Impartial_Opinion United Kingdom +, writes (18 June 2012):

Yes but just because she says that doesn't mean she is obliged to hand it out to everyone and anyone who asks. 'If you want my number just ask' is one of those things which you commonly see on young ladies social networking pages and to be honest, as a general rule of the thumb, those are the ones to be avoided as most (although not all) are likely to be attention seekers of the male variety.

In the future, if you see a girl that you like then start up a conversation and see how it goes. Let it flow naturally and if talking to one another comes easily and you feel like there is a connection then it is more appropriate to ask for her number. Perhaps ask on the second or third time you speak to her so you don't freak her out and as a result, she is more likely to feel comfortable enough to give you her number! It will also be more likely that you know a little bit more about one another to hold a deeper converstaion via text.

It is also important that you don't take the rejection personally, it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you. See it as they are not worth getting to know you anyway. Best of luck (:(:

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A female reader, Daisy_Daisy United Kingdom +, writes (18 June 2012):

Daisy_Daisy agony auntMany people have replied and you're still asking...! Read the replies again.

You approached it wrong by going too fast. A couple of messages and then asking for her number is too fast. You could've struck up a bit of conversation first, had a bit of a chat so she could get some idea of what you are like. She still might have said 'no' but I think you'd have had more chance of a 'yes' that way.

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A female reader, Daisy_Daisy United Kingdom +, writes (18 June 2012):

Daisy_Daisy agony auntMany people have replied and you're still asking...! Read the replies again.

You approached it wrong by going too fast. A couple of messages and then asking for her number is too fast. You could've struck up a bit of conversation first, had a bit of a chat so she could get some idea of what you are like. She still might have said 'no' but I think you'd have had more chance of a 'yes' that way.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

@Impartial Opinion- No I don't know her. But In her "about me" she said to ask for her number if you want it, so obviously she would hand out her number to someone she doesn't really know. Anyway, for future advice, did I approach her wrong?

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A male reader, crazydirtyred United States +, writes (17 June 2012):

Get to know a girl before you ask her for her number, that was just too creepy. She probably posted the number thing so she can get attention, or she might give it out to someone she finds extremely attractive. I've gotten 3 numbers from that site, and 2 of them asked me for mine first. Just get to know them and let them get to know you, could take a few days, or weeks. It's all about building up a friendship. What would you do if she gave you her number? Practice through messages, it helps ;)

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A female reader, Daisy_Daisy United Kingdom +, writes (17 June 2012):

Daisy_Daisy agony auntYou asked for her number much too quickly and she was wise not to give you her number (nothing personal - she should not be handing her number out to anyone she doesn't know). Yes, this is confusing given what she wrote on her profile. Maybe she'll change her profile, or she'll have dozens of guys like you asking for her number ....

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A male reader, Advice_man United States +, writes (17 June 2012):

Advice_man agony auntMy friend...you are too young to understand how manipulative a lot of girls can be, but i am sure over the next years you will be able to spot instantly those evil characters and avoid them. First of all, she posted that message to "test the waters", see how desirable she is. Lesson one: don't believe everything they say!! Second, be sure she has absolutely no interest in you. Most probably you didn't do anything wrong, that's how girls are. Lesson two: girls often act in a way that has no logical explanation, don't waste your time trying to understand what you did wrong. Just move on! Lastly, be sure that if a girl is interested in you, she will make sure you know. Best wishes.

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A female reader, Impartial_Opinion United Kingdom +, writes (17 June 2012):

Do you actually know this girl or just liked the look of her by her profile? If you don't know her then asking for her number before you even know each other is a bit creepy. I know I wouldn't just hand out my phone number to anyone who asked for it, they might turn out to be a crazy lunatic who just won't leave you alone! Either way, she isn't interested in you buddy...sorry!

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A female reader, here-to-hear Ireland +, writes (17 June 2012):

Do you have any background with this girl?

A lot of girls don't give their numbers out to guys they don't really know. Especially over the internet, whether they think they look attractive or not. I suspect her "If you want my number, just ask :)" was a bluff.

I also think that you probably jumped into it a little quickly. Try getting to know girls and building friendships with them before asking for their number.

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