A
female
age
26-29,
*eekn'boo
writes:Wtf! okay once i'm sorry for asking so much advice but :( i need advice aunts. My ex boyfriend and I are talking again and we are not going out officially but he only texts me/calls me/video chats me on the weekdays (btw we live 6 hours away from each other). why?? Like i previously mentioned he is in a frat but I texted him today (Friday) and said "Hi Baby, have a good day" and he read the message, began typing but didn't :( why?? What does this mean? While we were going out we texted all the time weekends, weekdays and holidays, everyday basically. I know we are not official but during the week he does initiates most of the calls/texts and even calls on his way to school and before he sleeps. He also still tells me he loves me, talks about the future which makes me think he's still interested but is he??I'm kind of confused and would love advice from you all because I don't want to continue wondering where I stand, at this point i'd rather stop this informal relationship.
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 October 2015):
 I see someone liked my response? lol
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2015): Why did you break up? And what has changed to make you think the same problems will not be there any longer?
As for the "why???"'s, you need to give it a break. You sound clingy and needy when you get yourself all worked up on why he's not texting you on weekends. Why? Because he obviously doesn't feel like it, it's that simple
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (10 October 2015):
 This one's easy. During the week.... whilest he has studying and attending classes to keep him occupied... he can keep up a facade of interest in you. On the weekends, he can get out and search for the hot coeds, there on campus.... and doesn't have time to spend texting/calling/writing letters to you......
Let some distance come between the two of you (Don't be so quick to access him....).... and see where things go. Don't be surprised if he reveals to you what I've suggested, above....
Good luck.....
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (10 October 2015):
 I think he is busy partying, catching up on school work, family and whatnot on week-ends.
If you have doubts, why not call him and ask? Or ask him when you are video-chatting with him? He IS the only one who can tell you where you two stand.
Why does he call/chat with you on the week-day if you are not a couple? Because he likes the IDEA of having a GF to talk to, he gets that "GF experience" - without having to deal with the "restrictions" of being in a relationship.
Honestly a 6 hour LDR might not work for you two. There can easily be a lot of misunderstanding going on because you two don't really know each other that well. For instance, a text "Hi Baby, have a good day" doesn't require an answer. He might have been heading some where and got busy. But your imagination are looking for the "worst case" scenarios to guess why he didn't answer or what he is doing and that... is only going to hurt you.
What you have right now seems more like a FWB (- the sex) and that is not something you seem to want. So I'd talk to him and see what HE wants - if you two can find a middle ground GO for it, if you can't, then I'd cut him lose.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2015): Wouldn't it just be easier to officially date someone nearer than 6 hours who isn't your ex???
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (10 October 2015):
Why did you break up? And what has changed to make you think the same problems will not be there any longer?
As for the "why???"'s, you need to give it a break. You sound clingy and needy when you get yourself all worked up on why he's not texting you on weekends. Why? Because he obviously doesn't feel like it, it's that simple. He's busy with other things and you're not the one on his mind/not his top priority. Grasp that. Accept it. There's nothing more to it, it doesn't mean anything else other than he's not doing it. Why does it bother you so much? If you feel like he's not giving you enough attention, ask yourself why you're still clinging to him and hoping to get back together. I mean honestly, feelings isn't all there is to a relationship.
If you like him, give it time and see how it goes without this paranoia. If him not texting you on the weekends bother you this much, then my advice to you is to STOP looking at your phone waiting for texts from him. Do something else, or just stop this entire "non official" texting romance you've got going, because it obviously isn't working for you.
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (10 October 2015):
 I think the best person to be asking about where you stand is him, we can only speculate with regards to the txt'ing. So speculate away I shall…perhaps he didn't know how to respond to being referred to as ' Baby ' and thought it a bit OTT if you are not yet bf/gf. There is the casual 'Babe', which I refer to people to as well and there is the 'Baby' which I think has a far more intimate tone. Frat house adventures I think would be the main reason for not making himself available on weekend but realistically you are not really in a position to be asking more of the situation when both he and you are free agents.
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