A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have had the same boyfriend for a yr and half. he has broken up w/ four times!!! and returns w/ in weeks ....anyone can tell me why??? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2009): It could be that he has been deeply wounded at some point in his life and he has a fear based approach to relationships and love.
He fears intimacy and commitment and has walls built along his heart and soul. He wants that, but is finding nearly impossible to do.
The only cure really is to get him into therapy with you and learn what is triggering those fears and to help him or both of you learn how to get closer without fear.
That is what is often going on in relationships where you keep breaking up with each other. Possibly every fight feels like the end to him, like you can not recover from it and still have trust in each other and the relationship, he lacks a feeling of safety.
A
male
reader, duce00 +, writes (7 December 2009):
 We can only speculate until you give us more information.
What were the things that he said when there was a breakup?
Why did you feel he was worth being with aging?
You will have to put in more detail here if you really want some accurate advice.
...............................
A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (7 December 2009):
 Deep down it could either be that he does not like something about you thus he breaks up. Or that he wants you to chase him or both
He thinks that being with you for a little while may help you to fall in love with him then he beaks up with you to see if you'll chase him or that if you are in love yet. When he realizes that you are not chasing him he comes crawling back to start the process again.
The above may not be exact but it's certianly something along those lines of the above behaviours. He sounds a bit insecure and a little weak. Some people do strange things to test things out.
;)
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (7 December 2009):
Because he knows you will take him back and he uses you. Clearly he's not the guy for you, and he doesn't love you enough, so for your own sake, perhaps it's time to move on. A man who treats you like this isn't worth the bother.
...............................
|
