A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This is more of a rant than anything else. But I'm just so confused and a bit pissed off to be honest. I met this guy online (mistake number 1) and we talked for months before meeting for the first time. The first meet went fine, it was over coffee and we just talked. When we left, he asked me out again for a second date, i agreed. Then of course he canceled the second date without really giving any notice and no reasonable excuse. But I like this guy so I decided to accept his excuse as real and not made up. We continued to talk and of course he asked me out again. And guess what? The day of, he canceled again saying we'll do it again at a later date. But I'm not going to fall for it this time around. I just don't understand why he would keep asking me out only to cancel each and every time and texting me inbetween. If he wasn't interested, as he obviously isn't, then why lead me on by bringing up additional dates? what's the point in that?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI completely agree with you Stayc63088. I should have learned the first time he canceled. Don't understand why, but also at this point, I don't even care why anymore. More than one guy out there
A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (21 November 2010):
 Oh and to answer your question as to why he still texts, to keep you as an option just in case.
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A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (21 November 2010):
I disagree completely. He isn't into you, don't accept another date to get shot down again. Continue to stand up for yourself. Once was too much, but twice cancelling on the same damn day?? Ridiculous. Even if he is seeing other people (which is fine until you are exclusive) he should have the courtesy to meet when he says he will, otherwise he is choosing something more desirable to him over his date he planned with you. No need to be someone's back burner. And if he is too busy to even keep a date within the first couple of weeks talking then you shouldn't be dating him anyway. I mean damn, my first date with my boyfriend last new year's eve his car blew up, caught on fire. He didn't even cancel then, I went and picked him up at a bus station and we ate dinner. Someone who is interested will MAKE the time. He's unreliable and undependable. Find a new guy.
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A
female
reader, tdntuck +, writes (21 November 2010):
 Communicate. I suggest addressing your concern in an email to him, that way he's not caught off guard and able to think about it and give you an honest explanation and not just an excuse. You'll get clarity and he'll be made aware of your discontent with that behaviour.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2010): Maybe he's just disorganised or been busy etc... Try having a word with him about it and ask what's going on. Also, if you two aren't exclusive yet then he could be dating other people aswell.
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