A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello - Why do you think he behaves this way ?We dated for several months but ended last september. We never lost contact but definitely was less frequent. Anyway he always crossed the friendship line with those "I would like to be with you" comments.We saw each other after two months and it was not the same but still ... he invited me, he kissed me ..He texted saying that he had lots of fun and asking me when can we see each other again and suggesting meet somewhere during the holidays.I said I would be very happy to see him again and asking him to chose when and where.No reply.Why do you guys ask for things you do not mean and who anyone was forcing you to ask for ?? I was done with him and for a moment I really believe he could want to get back together. Why hurt me in this unnecessary manner ? He know I really have feelings for him and we claims he cares so much about me ...Thank you !!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2010): Back to your original question. Why does he do this to you? Because he can, because he knows you'll let him. Because when he wants he can get you to open the door for him for sex and you'll let him.
Why would he stop when there are no bad consequences for him, only for you, he can do what he wants to you and you'll still take him back. He doesn't care about you, he has shown you this yet you still want him back and hope he loves you too when he doesn't. All he has are words and they're all lies.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2010): You didn't listen and you're not seeing the signs. He disappeared once now he's disappeared again.
Why would you take back a man who has hurt you so bad already? Why are you letting him use you like this? drop you whenever he wants then come back for sex.
You should move on from this guy, he has hurt you, he is hurting you now again and he will hurt you again the future. Why are you letting him do this to you? What's so special about this guy that you're letting him walk all over you?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your replies.
I think that i fear he will do it again despite he knows about my feelings. I do not why I trusted him from the beginning and his disappearing act - after several months together - just broke my confidence.
And well, i do not want to through the same thing again, I just like him too much I guess. On a positive note, if he does not reply I am not contacting him never again :)
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female
reader, Brooklyngirl  +, writes (30 November 2010):
 What I meant by that is that it has only been four days and you are asking for advice from us. Your feelings come through loud and clear (at least to me) that you are devastated he has not replied to your email.
I didn't realize that you never officially broke up, and that he just disappeared. Why would you want to go through that again?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhy is my reaction the issue ? I am not contact him to get an answer or nothing ... Actually it is true that I am feeling insecure with him but it was not always the case. The fact that he didn't break up with me, just disappeared, hurt me terribly. Anyway I do not know what is wrong with my reaction given that he didn't reply in four days.
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female
reader, Brooklyngirl +, writes (30 November 2010):
You seem to be putting too much importance on your date with him. He obviously wants to be casual friends, perhaps with benefits. He may have sensed your assumption that he might want to get back with you. It may have scared him.
On the other hand, he may not have decided when and where yet and is still thinking about it!
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female
reader, Brooklyngirl +, writes (30 November 2010):
I'm gonna agree with Cerberus on this one! You don't say how long it has been since you text him with your response. But no matter if has been a day or a month, it is your reaction that is the issue. Do you really want this going on during the holidays??
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI send my email on saturday. He does not reply because he does not feel like doing it. I am almost sure. This what I do not get it, he was the one sending this "we def need to meet again soon" sms ...
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2010): First off how long has it been without a reply? Something might have come up.
No need to freak out really, although it's always a bad idea getting back with your ex. I mean look how crazy miserable it's making you already. I'd stay away from him if I were you, there's just going to be more of this crap over xmas if you keep on seeing him.
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