A
female
age
30-35,
*arnes66
writes:My ex and I were on and off for few years and we lived 4 hours apart. We were planning to meet up last time but the plans kept falling through because of conflicting schedules .Then he ended up meeting someone closer.He had met other females when we were part in the past but I know that they didn't mean anything to him because he would always come back to me despite the distance. This time its different because he didn't have a problem telling me that he met someone else.He openly admitted that he likes her a lot.I was crushed knowing that he was taking another girl out ,kissing and getting to now her. I understand that he needs someone closer to him but it was terrible hearing him connecting with someone else.I told him that it was painful for me watching him dating someone else so its best we go separate ways. He agreed that it was for the best and he told ``fare well`` and that was itThat was 7 months ago and we haven't had contact since. The thing is, I haven't had much luck with dating. I had a big crush on another guy from work shortly afterwards which helped me to take my mind off my ex. My crush was flirting with me so I thought we had potential and he likes me backHowever, my crush never made a move or ask for my number. Then I found out from someone else that he has a live in gf.I still had a crush on him but he now left the company which put him out of sight ,out of mind . It made it easier for me to get over him.I recently had sudden urge to contact my ex just to see how he is doing. I thought about it more and I decided not to since its bad idea. If he is still with the same girl then I would be jealous and upset all over again . Now I find myself feeling jealous again about my ex being with someone else. I now find myself thinking about them having sex, hanging out and the fact that someone else took my place . I don't understand why I am feeling crappy again if I didn't contact my ex.why do I feel like the old wounds are being opened again without contacting him ?Is it because I haven't had any luck with dating?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (14 June 2015):
 Precisely.
You're bored, lonely, you havent had any luck with guys since your break-up while your ex seems to have moved on and is with other women while you're still hung up on him.
The mind is a powerful tool OP. If you let your imagination run wild then there's no end to it. One thought leads to another and as they say, an idle mind is a devil's workshop, you eventually just sit and keep thinking about things which just spiral out of proportion.
He's your ex OP, you agreed to break up, he has the right to move on. Accept that the relationship is over. You might not immediately find someone new and in a way its a good thing because you don't want to be in a rebound relationship. Just take some time off, be with friends and family, do something that you enjoy, like cooking, reading or just pampering a pet.
The more your think about your ex, the more it'll upset you. There's nothing you can really do about it, right?
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