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Why do I feel I need a boyfriend so much?

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Question - (11 August 2009) 8 Answers - (Newest, 13 March 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 18-21, *pannah96 writes:

I don't know the reason why, but i feel like i need a boyfriend, i really want one! People would say i'm desperate, or being peer preshured, but it's not like that, i really want somebody to be able to cuddle and kiss and just be there for me, i know i have my friends but i think i am ready for a relationship. Pleeaaaase help me! (Also i go to an all girls school so it is hard for me to interact with boys)

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A female reader, xXHottieLizXx Australia +, writes (13 March 2011):

Hi Spannah96. I know that it must have been a few years since you wrote this, but since the start of this year (2011) I have felt the exact same way. I just want somebody to cuddle, kiss and be happy with. I dream about it all the time. I think that it might be a good idea to get involved in some extra curricular activities like Scouts, Guides, a youth group or a sporting club. This might help you to meet some really nice guys. The more you get out there, the better chance you have to come across a decent male. One of the reasons you may feel this way is hormones, but that's only part of the picture. At a certain age, everyone feels like they need to find someone to share their heart with, and to love in an intimate way. Relationships are complicated (even though I've never had a boyfriend, I know how it is.), so just keep looking and eventually you will find the right one.

Being picky is a great thing, you don't just want to take whatever you can get. Find somebody you really like and build up a relationship with them. Eventually, you may feel that you have enough confidence to ask him on a date. SO DO IT! It's better to be rejected (though I'm not saying that will happen) than to spend your life thinking "What if?". Trust me, it's the worst feeling ever.

Good luck with finding someone and I hope this helped.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2009):

i read the reply on this and well i mean first off i haven't been kissed either and would like for that to happen but sometimes i get to scared or shy at some point and i just wanted to say its OK to haven't been kissed yet, because some girls have, but its because there taking things to fast,and if we haven't then it must be because we take things slow and easy and clam

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2009):

I feel like that too occasionally- i'm 16 and have never had a b/f and sometimes wish I did! I've never been kissed or anything but I'm gonna wait for a special boy to come along, not one of the usual twits that think they're wonderful. You could join as many clubs out of school that will allow you to meet some boys. Good luck!

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A female reader, Spannah96 United Kingdom +, writes (11 August 2009):

Spannah96 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you all for the advice :) And Yes i agree when you say wait for the right guy, that's what i have been doing, i havn't had a proper boy friend and i havn't even kissed a boy! My friends have but they have all been to parties and kissed random boys of which they don't know there names! I want to wait for the right person but i wish that i met him now.

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A female reader, xAx United Kingdom +, writes (11 August 2009):

xAx agony auntBoys your age are immature. They don't know how to be in a relationship at your age, trust me, i have had many boyfriends and found out that they get better as they grow older. Wait a couple of years.

Also, the fact that you really want a boyfriend is a bad reason to go out with someone. People are different when they are in a relationship, and if you do get one now because you want a boyfriend, you'll get bored of him eventually. Wait for the boy to come to you. Get infatuated/ in love with someone who is worth your time.

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A male reader, LazyGuy Netherlands +, writes (11 August 2009):

LazyGuy agony auntHormones.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2009):

It's clear why you want a boyfriend, but let me just tell you that it'll be so much more worth it to you to wait and find a guy who is right for you than to go off seeking someone and end up with some guy because you want a boyfriend so badly. It's better to be patient and wait for someone who can truly make you happy. I was 16 when I met my first boyfriend and I still wish i'd waited another couple years. He made me rediculously insecure and wasted three years of my life. I'd have been much better off without him. Just wait. I think it'll be worth it, dear.

~Sy.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2009):

sometimes i feel the same way but i dont want people to think im desperate or something like that but when i feel i want a boyfriend its usually because i miss my ex. or its something that makes me say "why did i break up with him", so maybe it could be that you either miss one of your ex's or maybe you want a boyfriend to not get bored with but if u really want a boyfriend just flirt when ever you hang out with your friends or whenever you go out

anyways i hope this helped

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