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Why did my crush act like this?

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 May 2010) 7 Answers - (Newest, 17 May 2010)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Yesterday evening I was over at my crushes house to hang out with her brother. I finally got the nerve to make a move by giving her a what I like to call a "promise to date" ring.

Anyway, the way I was going to go about giving it to her was to first have her look up what they are by using Google. This is where the trouble began. First of all, she asked me to type it in. I asked her why, she didn't say much. Then I asked her if she could spell it, she said no (I didn't think that much of it until later on when I saw a piece of paper, in her handwriting, that mentioned the word promise). When I typed it in for her and got to the site I was thinking of, an ad popped up. She clicked it off and we finally got to the site. She saw a few seconds of it, then another ad came up. That's when she said "what is this?". I said "just an ad" and clicked it off. Once everything was settled down she began to look at the site itself, but soon stopped and said "I'm not reading this." I asked her why not and she sort of gave me an I don't know. Then she said "I'm going upstairs". By the way, when she said these things it was in a very quiet and shy manner.

Some of the signs of liking me that she showed in the past (and convinced me to do what I did) include: looking at me when I'm not looking at her (sometimes while giggling), mimicking me, asking people she knows questions about me, showing concern for me if she thinks I’m in trouble, her friends act differently around me, sometimes she blushes around me, etc.

What does all of this mean and where should I go from here?

View related questions: crush, shy

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I doubt her parents would let me do that.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010):

how about just asking her to do something cool, like bowling, or see a film, or get some food or something like that! and leave the rings out of it..... :D

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Is there anyway I can make things right?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010):

Gosh you have amde things so awkward!!!! WHY OH WHY would you ask her to look them up on google and just stare over her shoulder as she does it, it's really strange, you can only do that when you're officially going out. You could have done something way cooler, typed in a cool place you know into google, like a bar or resteraunt

or something , and go hey I'm taking you tehre saturday

OR NOT USED GOOGLE AND JUST ASKED HER OUT.

X

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010):

Ok, first of all... maybe you can post the url of the website you wanted her to look at on here so we can see it too... but as soon as you mentioned the word ring, I can totally understand her reaction... rings mean long term commitment and engagement... if you wear the ring that a guy gave to you, it pretty much means your engaged, even if its not official, and its not a diamond ring. Ive been wiht my bf for 4 years almost and he still knows that im not ready to wear a ring from him. now a nice normal ring as a present on a birthday when you are already dating, so long as it fits a finger not your engagement ring finger is fine... but i would find it a bit creepy and be really put off if someone gave me a "promise to date" ring... also, how old are you? and how old is she? this sounds more like something a middle school kid would do...

Anyways, I would back off a bit, try to hang out with her, ask her to a movie or something like that, and take it from there.... and stay awway from the jewlery until you are actually dating and its a birthday or holiday!! :D

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A male reader, Myau New Zealand +, writes (15 May 2010):

Myau agony auntYou have gone about this whole thing all wrong from the start.

Why dont you simply tell her that you like her and ask if she would like to hang out sometime. Subtility isnt usually the best policy

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010):

why din't you just ask her out or make your feelings known verbally, rather than using a promise to date ring. Because asking someone out for coffee feel like much less of a commitment than any type of ring :/

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