A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met this guy on tinder and we started talking and hit it off right away... turns out we have tons of mutual friends. He was nothing but reliable and up for texting for hours. I found it nice that he even called me as most guys just text these days.We went on 2 hang out dates with a ton of friends and had fun or at least I thought. After our second hangout he added me to Facebook and continued to text throughout that night once I got home.Then all of a sudden he started taking forever to reply to my texts and then said his phone is sending messages in delays.. so I messaged him on Facebook where he continues to take forever.this is our convome: we gotta get your phone fixed this is hindering our communications lol.how was yesterday did u go shopping?him: yeah i finally found a pair of bootsme: so need to grab a bite so you can show them to me lolhim: I didn't know eating and seeing my boots were exclusive thingsHe is starting to play games with me and I am not sure how to play it back.. any help what my next move should be?
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (31 January 2014):
 The fact that you havent even been on a date yet shows he was never really interested from the start, I think you have just mis-read the situation I'm afraid.
You HUNG OUT. With FRIENDS. That is not a date. That is the behaviour of a guy who doesnt really like a girl that much so wants to have his friends around to ensure nothing gets too flirty or touchy-feely.
If he liked you he would have asked you out, just the two of you - simple as that. Men are really simple, dating in fact is really simple. If a guy likes you, he will do all in his power to see you. If he is not bothered about you, he will play games with you until he gets bored and moves onto someone else.
This happened to me, and happened recently to my friend. She really liked a guy, they would text all the time, he told her how much he liked her etc. They hung out with friends a couple of times and even went on one date (eventually, after a few months of talking). Then nothing happened, just more talking and a bit of flirting. She liked him so much and was upset nothing was progressing. Then I told her to forget about him and start dating others, she met a guy online and this guy did not play ANY games at all with her. He text and called frequently, he arranged dates promptly and after each date asked to see her again. That is what you call a guy who is interested. A guy who claims to like you but messes around only 'talking' and 'hanging out' doesnt truly like you, you are just a temporary thing to him until he finds someone better.
My friend never believed me until it actually happened, a guy should be blatantly keen if he really likes you and this guy is not blatantly keen.
Move on, dont worry about playing games with him - not worth it. He's not interested, if he was he'd have taken you out just the two of you by now. Dont message him anymore and dont chase after him, for whatever reason he's moved on so time for you to do the same.
A
male
reader, methuselah +, writes (31 January 2014):
Hello,
Based on his last response about 'exclusive,' I would now go silent on him and wait for him to make the next move. He seems to have cooled things a bit. Therefore, stop trying to 'lead' the communication. See if he responds to you.
If he texts or messages then you can reply, but I wouldn't send anything now until he does.
Only my ideas of course, but that's what I would do.
Hope it works out for you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2014): He thinks your after him, which of course you are .. See when you show a guy your too interested they become more laid back, and they think holy hell she might want me to date her ..If he's being a meanie to you .. Be a meanie back but put lol ( lots of laughs or haha at the end as to take the sting out ) For instance my reply would have been ' exclusive ?? Who lil moi, you would be so lucky haha ' another would be oo dear is that your head I heard hitting the door, your ego think it's gotta boost haha If he pushes push back .. Stop asking for him to sort his phone . In fact next time he texts wait two days then reply .. Say golly gee, I been mega busy just noticed you texted .. How you doing anywho ?? Keep it light .. Keep it simple .. He doesn't sound that nice to be honest .. Guys like to play silly games .. It's up to us girls to box clever .. Take care sweetie
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