New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244966 questions, 1084314 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

Why can't lovers be friends instead of enemies?

Tagged as: Friends, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 December 2014) 6 Answers - (Newest, 26 December 2014)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

Dear cupid I have a few exes in my life that I still communicate with but now all of a sudden everyone of them seems as if I did some thing wrong to them but I didn't.We as adults still talk to one another but now they are ignoring me.I'm not sexual with none of them I moved 3000 miles away to have peace but I m thinking every body has grown up I guess not.I thought we all could be friends in spite of our differences.Today is Christmas I spoke to one of them on fb he ignored me so what can I do in this situations. Happy Holidays ??

View related questions: christmas

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (26 December 2014):

If you didn't do anything wrong then you didn't do anything wrong- no need to wonder. They just moved on and aren't interested in a conversation.

<-- Rate this answer

A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (26 December 2014):

Honeypie agony auntI think it's really up to how a relationship ended, and down to the individuals. Some people can become friends down the line, others can't really. They just keep tabs on exes for whatever reasons, familiarity, lingering feelings, so forth.

I think a LOT of people cut ties, because they KNOW keeping them around in any facility means moving on can be harder. And some because their NEW partner aren't interested in all that past baggage.

If they ALL of a sudden make a choice to "dump" this friendship. LET them. Because OBVIOUSLY it didn't mean anything important to them any more. It may suck, but you rally only have one choice, and that is to accept it and respect it.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2014):

if they ignore you it doesn't mean you are enemies. They just are not very interested in seeing or talking to you anymore. Honestly, i am not interested in talking to my ex-s. Why? They are my exs for a reason. I never understood why people who separate still want to hang out, unless they were awesome friends to begin with.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (26 December 2014):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntThey are "EX-es" fer cryin' out loud..... They're "ex-es" for a reason......

Now, GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE, and don't spend another neuron of mental energy worrying about them or what they think of you.....

good luck...

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2014):

If I may add, most of the time it's the new woman in their lives who'd prefer they cut ties with you!

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2014):

You may harbor warm and fuzzy feelings and want to maintain goodwill toward your exes; but they've all moved on. A breakup leaves a bad-taste in the mouths of past lovers for a long-time; it doesn't matter who's fault it was, or why it had to happen. Sometimes people never let go of the bitterness, and the memories they have of the old relationship doesn't allow good feelings to overcome their underlying resentment of you.

It is a chapter most people wish to close in their lives, even if they had an amicable breakup. You have the ability to forgive and forget, all people can't do that.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "Why can't lovers be friends instead of enemies?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0156445000029635!