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Why can't I find a guy who wants to commit to me?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 May 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 10 May 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, *rustratedh writes:

Hi, I am 28 year old female, who is a single mother to a beautiful daughter. I left her father 4 years ago, and for the first 2 years i have enjoyed the single life.

However for the past 2 years since i have felt ready to settle down, all i seem to get is one user after the other. The last guy i dated knocked me for 6, i was beginning to relax and enjoy the feeling of being with someone again when 3- 4 weeks later its all over. He has since been back on the scene and his excuse was he didnt want to hurt me, yet he clearly doesnt want me back now.

I just feel i cant find a guy who wants to commit to me, also part of the problem is that i always find myself starting it all off with sex, never waiting its as if i cant relate to a guy unless its sexually. I do love sex but i do want more than that. How can i get out of this rut???

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A female reader, frustratedh United Kingdom +, writes (10 May 2009):

frustratedh is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you every one, A few things have happened since i posted that questions, I have did a lot of soul searching and have since realised that i need to sort my own head out right now, until i learn to love and appreciate myself how can anyone else love and appreciate me?

Also the man (and i use that word lightly) in question has shown his true colours and basically i have been played all along. I can not believe I ever thought he was worth my time let alone my heart.

So once again thanks.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2009):

my dear ,take life easy and forget about any man to hook onto now.every good thing comes in due time.you can not influence it.But dont forget to look onto God.you will be ok.

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A male reader, LazyGuy Netherlands +, writes (8 May 2009):

LazyGuy agony auntBecause you weren't looking?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2009):

1. Keep dating the type of guys you're attracted to, but be selective and cautious about who you go out with at the same time.

2. DO NOT have sex until you are in a committed relationship. I'm a guy and sometimes we're deceived by our own sexual urges. We think we love the girl, have sex with her way too soon and then realise that it was nothing but lust and feeling terrible. And that's not even bringing up all the guys whose primary interest is said sex. So wait - not a few dates, but until you are secure in your relationship.

3. Don't get too distressed. You will find the right guy if you keep looking. Just calm down and approach the whole affair in a more casual and, might I say it, logical way.

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