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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:why are there so many people in society and especially on here that get so hostile? everyone asks for advice, but when some of them are given answers they turn nasty and don't want to know. or you just get plain rudeness.if you don't want to hear the truth why ask? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionit's a big sword. lol. hmm
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2009): I think the justice statue shows a woman with a SET OF SCALES and a sword (or is it just a sword?)
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2009): My best guess is that because some people don't really want advice in the first place. What they want is someone, even if its just 1 person, to co-sign to the insane path they want to choose. And when 99% of the aunts are saying, "Gee, sleeping with your husband's/wife's sibling isn't a good idea," they get defensive and start claiming "well, you don't know the whole story" or whatever. Its BS. They know it. But the problem is what they REALLY want to hear is "go for it!" In a way, someone else telling them to do it almost alleviates them of responsibility, even though they know better. Granted, that's not everybody... there are a lot of people who either want to be talked down off of the proverbial ledge into insanity, or people who truly don't knwo what to do. But those who get hostile? They were never looking for advice to begin with. They were just looking for someone to give them permission to do the stupid thing they want to do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2009): Because we all think we are perfect....and we are not! the difference is , some don't want to believe that fact.
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reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (4 February 2009):
 As said, people often just want to be told what they want to hear. If you go against that it upsets their world view.
People in trouble are often there for a reason, they didn't make the right choice. But human nature is such that we then start to defend that wrong choice rather then admit we made a mistake.
Say you buy a car, you researched your options and choose what you thought was the best car. Then you come home and turn on the tv and see your car being reviewed as the worsed car ever. (Dutch commercial) Apart from being funny to an outside, you would NOT question your own decision but the view of the reviewer. How can he claim that car is the worsed when you KNOW it is the best.
If you can fix this, you would have fixed all of the world troubles.
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reader, Dazzerg +, writes (4 February 2009):
 I think other people have pretty much hit the nail on the head. People have preconceptions and often when they ask for advice what they in fact want is reinforcement of their own belifes. I'm a bit weary of saying 'the truth' because a situation often has several truths to it rather than one definitive one. We provide a certain one from our vantage point as complete outsiders which is often the hardest to see when you are 'in the eye of the storm' and its not always a pleasent one....
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reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (4 February 2009):
Their friends tell them to dump the guy so they come on here hoping we will say "Follow your heart! He'll change! You just need to be a bit nicer to him and then he'll realise how great you are and stop all the bad behaviour."
Or they say "Oh I'm trapped in an awful relationship and I would leave him and then he would be sad so I've just been shagging his brother instead..." and hope for sympathy.
So when we tell them the nasty truth then they get defensive of either their actions or their horrible partner etc.
Good Luck!! xx
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reader, CarregCariad +, writes (4 February 2009):
 I was planning on asking this question a few days ago! I agree with TELLULAH, they want you to say what they want to hear so things are easier for them. They already have their own opinion on things and when they ask for advice on what you think, they want you to agree with them but just don't want to say it outright,People are daft.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2009): Its like the beer glass thats knocked over.Some see a half full glass, some a half empty one.Truth depends on your eye and how life has moulded you.You are 22-25Bet you saw things differently at 16, as you will at 55.So you don't know it all yet kiddo, i'm still learning myself and i'm 47Good luck
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reader, Ed1337 +, writes (4 February 2009):
 I think some people can be too honest with you. What you have to remember is that a lot of people who ask for help are feeling very emotional and depressed, so you have to be honest with them in a way that doesn't make them feel like they are worthless.
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reader, TELLULAH +, writes (4 February 2009):
 Very true!
Perhaps they are hoping that someone will say exactlly what they want to hear, and then it gives them freedom to make stupid choices.
I dont know its just a theory.
XX
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