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Why am I so moody, and how do I stop it? I'm scared of losing my boyfriend!

Tagged as: Breaking up, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 July 2007) 21 Answers - (Newest, 16 March 2012)
A female Australia, anonymous writes:

I seem to get upset about every little thing, especially when it comes to my boyfriend of 6 months. I'm super sensitive to everything!

I don't know what to do, because my bf is getting quite sick of me being upset/moody all the time. I never used to be like this, but for the last 1-2 months I have been non-stop upset. I don't know why, I just seem to get upset about everything. I dont know if its because I have good reasons to be, so thats why I'm upset or if their is something else causing this.

I'm scared of losing my bf. I know its really hard for him to see me upset all the time. He said it makes him feel like a terrible bf because he cant fix my problems for me. He gets realy frustrated sometimes and starts yelling at me cause it makes him so angry...I don't know what to do. How do I stop being upset all the time? I try to hide my feelings but he can always see through it.

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A female reader, Valenzetti13 United Kingdom +, writes (16 March 2012):

Ladies I know exactly where you are coming from. I was with a wonderful guy for 2 years who told me at the end he felt like he was walking on eggshells all of the time because I always got my way in the relationship. After he dumped me I met another guy, better than the first and I think he is the guy I want to marry, however tonight he said the exact same thing that sometimes he can't tell me the truth because he feels like he is walking on eggshells, I don't know of its just me but I always continue an argument on for no reason other than I want my say. All I can say to you who are in the same boat is that you need to see that sometimes its not his fault and I am trying to become a better person, I hope you are all better than me and can be true to yourselfs because even my own family have called me a 'moany bitch' in the past and I am determined to change that. I know how you all feel and it's horrible but if you really love him then you can make it work. You are together for a reason so don't let that go.

Good luck to everyone

X

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A female reader, Bishbash United Kingdom +, writes (3 February 2011):

I have been with my boyfriend for 6 months an i couldn't be happier with him he is the best but lately I have been having really bad mood swings o thought at first it may be to do with pms but I don't think it is altogether after Reading a few posts I'm glad I'm not alone in feeling this way

here are some of the reasons i think I'm

behaving like this :

• I'm too happy feel like I don't deserve to be happy

• I'm depressed because it's winter (sad)

• college/work getting too much

• read some wear that havin too much caffeine an a unhealthy diet can affect ur mood

so I'm gona cut down on my caffeine, Get a healthier diet, get my self some positive goals and slow down take a breath an realise that life is short if i feel like I'm gonna be moody with someone I care about and risk losing them then I just need to calm down an relax

hope this helps somebody else :)

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A female reader, down but not out United Kingdom +, writes (9 November 2009):

hello to everyone, it was such a welcome relief to find other women out there who feel like this, I am not alone. I find it very difficult to understand why I get like this. I have a lovely new man in my life, who hasnt done a thing wrong, yet the last 6 weeks I have become very moody for no good reason, I have had difficult relationships in the past and lost my baby, all these things have broke me over the years, but I thought I had started to mend. I work full time and have 3 wonderful children, but I will lose my boyfriend if I continue to act like this, I have to stay positive, and think before I react to something, I dont want to be moody, and I think that by acknowledging the fact that we say we are moody is a step in the right direction to helping ourselves stop behaving like this, easier said than done, so just take one day at a time. Take a deep breath and relax. Life is short so we should make the most of it and not push the ones closest to us away.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009):

i read your post and i also know what u r going threw i been with my boyfriend for 10mo and for some reason im just moody all the time i cry randomly and i get upset easy and everything just seems to piss me off .. i myself dont understand this problem i often think its me my bf trys to do everything to help me.. i sometimes cant even stand myself. i was never like this befor. i changed so much i dont understand it .. im looking for help thats when i found this.. i just want to to know that im in the same boat as u. so if u find any answer plz help me out my email adress is [Email address blocked]

i hope we all find answer.

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A female reader, Secil United Kingdom +, writes (25 July 2009):

Hi there. I know what you are going through, which is why I was particularly interested in your post. I have the same problem with my current bf and i have no idea why. Most of the time i just blame him for my mood swings, and we end up falling out. I don't know what to do. Even if i try to calm down, it only last for 10mins and i start complaining about something else (stupid really!).

I know this is not much of an answer to solve your problem but just by reading your post, i realised there is someone else going through the same thing as me. This will hopefully help me change the way i am. hopefully help you too.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2009):

ok so i read some of the responses to this question, and i am also super moody but i am not on the pill. all of these seem like good ways to control my moodiness but none of them seem to work for me. any other suggestions? my husband is getting sick of my moods

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2008):

Hey my name is emily.

i have been in this relationship for 5 year almost 6 now. an im 22 almost 23 an i have been havin a heard time with my mooyness too. i have only 4 people in my family now..i had more family but let me tell you little bit about my self.. i had my grandpa die oct 13 04 and then i had to go put him into the ground as i call it. oct 25 o4 then i had my little girl the nexted day on the oct 26 o4...5 or 10 min from my aunt karen bday an thay was on the oct 27 04. but then she die jan 19 05. soo i had two leave an 1 come into the world. it was very bad with mood swings an getting upset an crying my self to sleep sometimes but very soon im goin to the docter. for some of being depressed an anzity... an moodyness as well...i would think you would need to do the some an talk to a docter about would is goin on..an maybe he/she can help you out with getting on some happy pills...so you can deal with the problems your haveing...cuz if this man/dude does not understand would your all upset about an he does not give you a hug or let you cry on him when your crying..then he's no good for you. he does not understand what is goin on. i hope this helps you an other's..

PS: dont let people hurt your feel's always keep your smile. *~Emily~*

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A female reader, hlskitten United Kingdom +, writes (13 July 2008):

hlskitten agony auntmoody girl you need to explore the idea that you are suffering from pmt at times, before you ruin your relationship for good.

c xxxxxxxxxxx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Moody_girl-

I am sorry that your partner has left you, it must be really hard to deal with.

As my situation happened a long time ago I figured out what was going on. I was "moody" and insecure due to my bf's behaviour as he was very abusive. At the time, I didnt realise this though. I later broke up with him. It seemed like "everything" made me angry because he was always abusive and it just never stopped.

I went to counselling and found out I was suffering from depression due to the situation I was in.

So about you...first you have to figure out whats causing them so you can deal with them.

is there anything at all happening in your life that could be geting you down? Is there any issue that you are not facing? I think your moodiness could be part of a much bigger problem. Or you could be suffering from depresion liek i was too.

What sorts of things do you get upset about? are you sure they are not rational things to get upset about?

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A female reader, Moody girl New Zealand +, writes (12 July 2008):

Hay i know just what you mean, I've been with my partner for 7 and a half year's and he has just walked out on me and our 2 daughter's as he has had enough off my mood swing's and said we needed a break other wise i was going to lose him for good.

I dont know why i am doing it one minute im happy the next im arngry and mad or even upset about something and i dont even know why or what made me be like that.!

Please if you know of a good way to control my mood swings please let me know and i'll do the same for you.

Thanks

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A female reader, princesstash7 United Kingdom +, writes (18 May 2008):

i was in the same posistion as you i was the wrlds moddiest person ever and my boyfriend keep telling me i had to change i was so scared of loseing him but the way i started to be less moody was when you can fill yourself getting the hump before you take it out on the ones you love pick up the phone find something fun to do or look back at something fun u have done in your life i wont sort it out completetly but its a start xxxx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2008):

I have the same problem with being moody. I wish I had some answers.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008):

Yep, I've just changed my pill because I've been a complete nightmare for the last 6 months, I'd even gotten my doctor to refer me to a pyshcologist. Didn't think about the Pill I was on either until my periods started happening mid cycle...oops time for a change, I'm hoping this one is better but it will take a few months to tell. My poor boyfriend, i know exactly want you mean, he broke our door because he got so angry at me crying over nothing at all again. Ah to be a man...next life perhaps?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2008):

I’m not sure what your going though but I know what can help, if you get out at least 30 min. a day and just run(yes, run) I think you be ok.

Now what does running have to do with me being moody?

5, 10 min. after you run you brain starts to release some call indolfin(I think I miss spell that) indolfin is the stuff that makes you fell good, calm and relax, smoking a cig. Should have the same affect, but I would never suggest that.

Trust me it works and it’s FREE

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007):

Hi again

Yes take a visit to your doctor or nurse.I was really bad for 2 years, yep 2 years! the pill never entered my head, my sister happenedto ask which 1 i was on. Turned out, it was the exact onemy mum and sister were bad on too! so came off it, it took approx 3 months and i was fine. Ive tried 4 different ones now, and got settled, only to be diognosed with DVT, i was mortified ! now im on a mini pill which i started 3 weeks ago, and babes, im too again starting to become very sensitive, insecure and moody! but i always give myself a month or 2. Then i suppose if im still feeling bad, the search continues :-) unfort the pill is a nightmare for some, like me lol

Dont worry, you will soon be sorted, it may take a few to try before you get settled.

:-)

If you want to chat, you can msn me

[email address blocked]

As i had a horrendous 2 years, experienced the lot ! even phycho fits ! yep its true :-)

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A female reader, sexi South Africa +, writes (27 July 2007):

sexi agony auntHi, i know exactly what you are going through. I am not on the pill but there are times when i get reall moody and upset. It is really unfair that we take it out on our bfs. My bf is really understanding at times and we are always speaking about our relationship. At times i tell him " i feel really moody/upset,please bear with me" and he does. He even understand that when i get PMS i am very moody but then he expects it and understands. Just tell your bf to understand what you going through and that you really love him and dont want to lose him ( Reassure him before he misunderstands you and thinks that you have lost interest and don't want to be with him.) Everything would work out for you once you have let him know what you feeling.If he really loves you he would understand and be paitent with you.

Good luck & let me know what has happened

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (27 July 2007):

TELLULAH agony auntHi again,

Honest its nothing to worry about, and its more comon than you think. What's more embarasing, going to the doctor or bursting into tears for no reason.

It can all be sorted very easy XX

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Female reader, anonymous- i just started the pill today actually and im worried my emotions are going to be even more worse then ever before. the info inside the packet does suggest it could make you feel depressed as a side affect.

tellulah- yeah i guess i should go see my doctor about it, as soon as i get my car up and running, because i dont want to ask anyone to take me, because they will want to know why and im not comfortable telling them.

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (27 July 2007):

TELLULAH agony auntHi

There is light at the end of the Tunnel. I was like this a couple of years back. I did not stop crying all the time, and drove my partner nuts.

All that was wrong was a hormone in-balance, so the doctor sorted this out for me. It took a couple of months to start working, but now I am fine. I do still cry, but only for a reason. And it has to be a good one.

Go see your doctor

XX

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A female reader, hlskitten United Kingdom +, writes (27 July 2007):

hlskitten agony auntFirst off have you started any new contraception recently, the hormone types? Because i cant take any of those, they give me horrendous mood swings.

Secondly are you feeling insecure about something but dont know why?

I was a nightmare for a year with someone because my instincts told me they werent being totally honest with me. Turned out i was right.

Sometimes stress and anxiety causes us to be terrible to be around.

Hope you get to the bottom of it.

C xxxx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007):

Are you on the pill ?

It happenedto me. I had tocome of the pill and try a new 1.The pillturned me into sum1 else

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