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When I talk to a boy all they talk about is how hot my friends are. What should I do?

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Question - (3 April 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 4 April 2007)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

what should i do?i have 2 freinds that are really hot and all the guys like them.and i am ugly and fat.so all the attention goes to my friends.the sad thing is that one is really mean and the other one is a snob.what should i do if i have hot friends and am ugly and fat.when i talk to a boy all they talk about is how hot my friends are.what should i do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2007):

Honey, when I was your age I had two incredibly hot sisters and one of them's nickname for me was "fat pig".

I look back now and I was never more than a size 10/12 (UK) and I was so pretty, but I felt hideous and enormous.

People who put you down do so because they are jealous or insecure.

Every day give yourself a compliment in the mirror, then give someone else a real compliment too, and see how they light up. (If they don't move on to someone who can appreciate you.)

I am not the most gorgeous woman, and certainly not as stunning as I was at your age but now everyone tells me I am gorgeous because I smile so much, I feel gorgeous and people love to be around me because I make them feel good.

Be beautiful by taking an interest in the people around you and yourself and people will see you as very beautiful very soon - boys too! And watch "Now Voyager" for real inspiration.

x

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A female reader, dragonette Sweden +, writes (4 April 2007):

dragonette agony auntDear, I think you should go find other friends and try to find nicer boys to talk to.

If one of them is mean and the other is a snob, how come you consider them your friends?

And the guys that you talk to don't seem very nice either. Only a total dork would talk about how hot a girl's friends are when they're with her.

And please don't call yourself "ugly and fat". It's not good for your self esteem. I know that at your age looks matter, and sometimes when you look in the mirror you want the earth to swallow you, but it will pass. A girl's body often gets a bit chubby before puberty in order to start of the hormone processes that will make you a woman, so think of yourself as a butterfly and imagine that right now you're in your cocoon state.

If you want to, you can PM me any time.

Wishing you happiness,

/dragonette

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2007):

you should have more self esteem everyone is special in their own way. im sure one day one guy will see you in a crowd with you friends and he will pick you instead of them!! dont worry and if the boys only talk about your friends then they are obviously horrible people you should go and find some1 else thats about the boys, and im sure wot they really think of you they are just to afraid to tell you i bet they really like you!! it is about whats on the inside that counts

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