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When I see the guy at work, he looks at me like a rabbit in the headlights! Why?

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Question - (19 March 2006) 4 Answers - (Newest, 19 March 2006)
A female , anonymous writes:

At work there is a guy who I shall call X. We have spoken to each other a couple of times in the past but he is quite shy. The problem is that every time I bump into him at work it catches him by surprise and he stops in his tracks and looks straight at me. He never approaches me to talk to me. I don’t know why he does this, but it makes me wonder and I feel uncomfortable not knowing why he does this. Can someone tell me why this guy reacts like this?

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A male reader, sakic +, writes (19 March 2006):

you were looking for a guys perspective will now u got it lol. As a fellow male i know for me and for most other guys, talking to i girl i have an intest for can be horrifying. no affense lol. To me Mr. X does seem like he has in intrest in you. So therefor my advice to u is to approach him in a casual manner. Talk to him like you were an old friend. This should help break some of the tension caused by his shyness. If everyhting goes well invite him out for coffee or somthing. nothing serious. I can guarantee he will say yes. Theres no rules stating a women cant make the first move

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A female reader, Carr1e +, writes (19 March 2006):

I have had some experience with this in the past and there is a surefire way to find out if he does this in response to just you or all girls. Observe him for a few days interacting with other girls, does he also do this with them. If so, it will probably just be a confidence thing. If he only reacts like this with you then it sounds like he has feelings for you, and over thinks scenarios when he bumps into you, searching his brain for something funny or cool to say, and he probably doesn't realise that instead, he looks terrified, and should just be himself. If you have feelings for him and are confident then you will need to help him along, make most of the effort at the beginning until he starts to ease up around you. If you don't have feelings for him, them just make the encounters as brief as possible to avoid the uncomfortable feeling. Hopet this helps.

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A female reader, shania United Kingdom +, writes (19 March 2006):

shania agony auntIt could mean anything,if he is very shy then it might be because he isnt sure how to approach you...hence the staring or it might be because he likes you and he is trying to make eye contact...but if it does make you uncomfortable then maybe its best that you dont talk to him.I think he is probably quite nervous around you and maybe more so with women around him....i wouldnt worry too much about it,its just the way he is.

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A female reader, vixsfix +, writes (19 March 2006):

vixsfix agony auntHe sounds really sweet that your beauty amazes him on a daily basis, though getting him through this stage could be hard work. If you're interested then you need to make a conscious efort to talk to him when ever you can without being stalkerish!!! You need to get him used to your presence so that he stops reacting in this way and is able to feel more comfortable and express his true personality so that you can get to know him.

If you're not interested or not up to the challenge my best advice is to completely ignore his existence, soon he'll get the message and be too afraid to approach you anyway.

Men don't like to make it easy for us do they?

A male perspective may help you further

Good luck x x x

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