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When does it mean when a guy says he wants to be in a relationship with you but is too busy?

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Question - (24 May 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 24 May 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

when a guy says he doesn't want you to wait around for him, like if he's busy with finishing school and doesn't have time for a relationship, even though he wants to be in one with you. what does he really mean? guys say this all the time, but in my opinion, i feel like they really do want you to wait for them. am i right?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

More than likely he enjoys getting sex but does not want you as a girlfriend....he is using you.

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A female reader, QuirkLady United States +, writes (24 May 2009):

QuirkLady agony auntIf a guy tells you he is too busy, he is telling you that he cannot give you the attention and love you deserve. If you're willing to settle for less you can wait if you want, or go out and find someone who can give you what you need.

I vote for the latter every time.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

It means he doesn't want to hurt your feelings by saying he doesn't want to be your boyfriend but he's willing to have a casual thing on his terms. Are you up for that?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

Having been fed this line before myself, my guess is he's trying to let you down nicely. Sorry to hear it. Good luck.

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A male reader, Dr. John United States +, writes (24 May 2009):

Dr. John agony auntGuys like this may be battling to get their priorities in order. In this case they are more worried about getting the best job and I am sorry to say, if that is where their priority stays they will never make a good mate that will stay with you for the long haul. Doc

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

If a guy says he is too busy for a relationship but wants one with you he is speaking out of both sides of his mouth and he doesn't know what he wants. Why would you wait around for a guy that doesn't know what he wants? If you want to remain friends fine, but I would date other guys, maybe he really is focusing on school and wants to finish without distractions or the responsibility of a relationship, if so he isn't emotionally available and he is telling you that he isn't interested in a relationship, and perhaps he respects you too much to lead you on or have a casual fling with you.....or perhaps he is letting you down easy, but I think men for the most part say what they mean, don't over analyze it unless he is a compulsive liar I would take him on his word.

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