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male
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*.W.
writes: I'm in 7th grade and there is a girl who I really like. I've never had a girlfriend before and want to ask her out. The only problem is, I don't know what to say when I ask her out. Do I just say "will you go out with me" or what?
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male
reader, J.W. +, writes (21 March 2006):
J.W. is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOkay, I finnaly asked her out, but she hasn't answered me yet. shes in florida right now and has been since the day after i asked her. after i told her i love u, she said " i love you to, i guess. does this mean she wants to go out with me or what?!?!?!. please help me!!!!!
A
male
reader, J.W. +, writes (14 March 2006):
J.W. is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI really don't know her that well, just well enough to know that shes that special one for me...thanks for everbodys help and please post your thoughts!!!J.W.
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A
female
reader, Hopeful +, writes (14 March 2006):
 As usual, Bev has said it well.
I would just try and keep it short, casual and confident.
Find out what she is interested in and ask her out around that "your football team is playing mine this weekend, would you like to come over to my place and watch the game" or "I got some movie tickets to see "xyz" - I thought you might to like to see it with me, I hear its good"
Keep it low key and really casual and definitely don't mumble or say something like "i know you won't want to but..." - it sounds negative and like you don't believe in yourself.
Girls like confidence, not arrogance but confidence. I would do it also when she is on her own, not in front of her friends. Girls can get really embarrassed in front of their friends and may be swayed by them. I would find a time when you are alone together and start talking, if she says "I really like watching xyz on TV or I really like that band", use that as a jumping off point to say "that is my favourite TV show too, it would be great if one day you can come over to my place and watch it together or I have their new CD, if you want to borrow it, I can drop it over to you or we could see a movie on the weekend if you want and I can lend it to you then" etc.
This way its not so formal nor so scary for you or her! It's relaxed and will give you the chance to get to know her better!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (13 March 2006):
 Actually, yes. That's pretty much how it's done.
Of course, it depends a lot of how well you know her. If she's a girl from one of your classes and she works with you on assignments, or is a friend you know well enough to talk to, then you can say "Hi Lydia. My dad got tickets to Saturday's soccer game and I was hoping that you'd come with us. Are you interested?" Or "There's a great movie playing on Friday. Would you like to go with me?"
Otherwise, if you don't know her very well at all, you might need to catch her after school or between classes and give yourself a bit of an introduction: "Hi Chelsea, I'm Dan Webster. We were in the choir together last year..."
It can help keep you calm if you phrase the invitation so that you're asking her along to something, as if you already intended to go, for example "My family is going to the lake on Sunday and we're allowed to take a friend. I was hoping you'd like to go with me."
Make the invitation positive and upbeat ("I'd like for you to go" = good) rather than too negative ("I don't suppose you'd go, would you?" = not so good).
Finally, don't worry about smooth pick-up lines. Mostly, then just sound tired and rehearsed, and girls would rather go out with guys who just say what's on their minds. You can take that advice into adulthood, btw. You don't need a pick-up line to ask a girl out; just be pleasant and friendly.
So, summarising. Introduce yourself if you need to, ask her along to something with a smile on your face and keep a positive attitude. And if by chance, she can't go this time, don't be too downhearted. There are always other Saturdays, and other girls. Really!
Good luck. I feel sure you'll be fine!
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