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What is the difference between a friends with benefits and a lover?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 December 2010) 5 Answers - (Newest, 28 December 2010)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

can somebody tell me the difference between a friends with benefits and a lover:

He said that I am his lover.... what does this mean? Does he care about me for the future? or is this just a temporary sex relationship?

What do you guys think?

View related questions: friend with benefits

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

ManAfterChrist, you seem to be talking from the heart. Thank you. I appreciate your sincerity and yes I am attached to this man. I've known him for about 4 months and finally I'm there but unsure of his real feelings. I know he likes me but .... maybe not enough.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2010):

To me, a FWB is more of a friend...someone you might go to events with friends, pal around with, have more than just sex in common with, etc. A lover to me suggests only sex or strong romance...so more secretive and little friendship.

A "fuck buddy"...now that is indeed sex only. Come in, get naked, fuck, leave.

THere are no clear definitions on any of these tho.

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A female reader, xanthic United States +, writes (28 December 2010):

xanthic agony auntThey mean the same thing, in my opinion. 'Lover' is just a sugarcoated term for a friend with benefits. It'd be safe to assume it's temporary and not going anywhere.

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A male reader, ManAfterChrist United States +, writes (28 December 2010):

ManAfterChrist agony auntConsidering you analyzed his choice of words, and thought on them enough to come here, I think it's safe to say you are attached to this man...

... and unfortunately I doubt it's as intense with him. Friends with benefits sounds so dirty and sleazy.. lover sounds romantic. But they mean the same thing (at least in my dictionary).

Be careful with yourself, Miss Anonymous. I hope everything turns out okay.

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A female reader, Dreamer1988 United States +, writes (28 December 2010):

Dreamer1988 agony auntIt means that he is in it for the sex. If you were his girlfriend, it would be for a relationship. Lover = friends with benefits... that's what I think. If you're not sure, ask him.

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