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What in the world does this guy want from me?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 March 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 March 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *avhez writes:

right...when i was 17 and workin in greece i met some one. we started a full relationship straight away with me movin in with him in greece( i am from the uk)

It was hard at first because i couldn't speak greek and was away from my family but i really loved him. My dad also died when i was out there, he was brillant in surportin me through that but we hardly had any money and i was always goin back to the uk and then greece again. we very rarely went out and at this point i was only 18,and he was 22. he spent alot of time with his family and i felt very loney.

we started fightin alot and he would get nasty with me not physcial but horrid fights!!we used to always say its finished but would make up again. It was in october 2007 after my 19th bday, when i went to the uk again and we were ok abit stained but ok, after a week in the uk he said it was over and that he would send my stuff. i was heartbroken, he called a couple of weeks later drunk askin me back but the next morning he didnt want me when i ask why he said he didnt love me anymore and didnt think of me. He also didnt send my things from ages and when they did come i had to pay £200!!!

i used to think about him sometimes but i was gettin better untill in feb 2008 he started to text me sayin "do u still pray for me" i have no idea what that means. i sent a email sayin that i wish him the best in life. he then started to call me early in the morning which i ignored. so he sent a email askin how i was, i sent one back sayin i was great and had a good job and was doin a night greek course. he sent one back 3 weeks later saying he was ok doing kickboxin but he "still lives with me sometimes and sometime not" and he also put in capitals hows ur mate tom (tom is a very old crush from school)which was odd but funny to read. i sent one back sayin every1 is great and that i had started kickin and what belt was he, i didnt saying anythink about tom or why if still lived with. (his english was good but writing very bad so i think he meant he still thought about me)

a week later he called me up at about 1.30 am i was awake so i answered. we talked about what we had been doin and he said alot about his new job which is more money, i said about my life too, he didnt believe me about doin a greek course (which i am) and asked about tom again and i just said that he was a old mate and why does that matter. then he said he wanted to call the house phone i said ok if he remembered it but he never called back which i thought would happen.

anyway all this was last night and i m very confused. i dont even no if i still love him, i miss greece and all the happy times we had and if i could go back i would but i dont no what he wants and why now call and talk to me!!! after i very bad break up

PLEASE help advice

View related questions: crush, drunk, heartbroken, money, text

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A female reader, lavhez United Kingdom +, writes (22 March 2008):

lavhez is verified as being by the original poster of the question

lavhez agony auntthanks so much for ur advice and i know its right.

in a way i am more confused then he is. sometimes i want to be with him but sometimes not and the only answer i have for myself is that i know everything was rushed we never had time to just date and be boyfriend and girlfriend it felt like marriage!!

I have no idea what will happen in the future but for now i just want to be young.

1 of the hardest things about the break up was moving away because it wasnt just him i lost it was his whole family. I still sometimes cry and laugh about him and sometimes i hate him. who knows what will happen in the future i know that i want to go back to greece to live but not untill i have myself sorted and safe. Thanks For ur Help it feels better to let it out!!

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A female reader, natasia United Kingdom +, writes (22 March 2008):

natasia agony auntI agree. He's just sentimental about you, and doesn't know what he wants. But for sure he's no good for you. FORGET HIM. Don't answer his calls or emails - that's what guys do when they don't want contact! Try it. I know it sounds harsh, but he is a bit crazy, in the way Greeks can be (I know - I lived there too). They can be wonderfully warm and exciting, but also it sounds like he is very changeable. He's back in touch with you because he hasn't seen you in a while, and he's bored, and you have become interesting again because he hasn't got you. Write him off. Don't answer. Go see Tom ; ]

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2008):

Your imagination is wild, you should try your hand at writing novels when you grow up...how many threads have you started in the past few weeks?

By the way, how are you getting on with your ficticious teachers?

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A male reader, nicklegames United States +, writes (22 March 2008):

If I were you I would write him off to experience. It doesn't sound like this guy has any clue about what he wants. Your best bet would be to tell him to quit contacting you because it just confuses you about what he wants. I think you are better off without him.

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